skinny jean faggots
by KillerMay
Summary: SASUSAKU; SUIKA au; Straight up, they sparkle. "So, I'm convinced that your pants are cutting off circulation to your brain, and I'm thinking that maybe you should just leave." COMPLETE.
1. A Beautiful Friendship

**AN. **I have an idea of who the narrator in the beginning is supposed to be, but it's none of the main characters. This story will be kind of weird, the title came to my mind and then the pairings but what it was actually about (besides how tight their pants are) kind of came last.

OH; and FYI-I mean no disrespect by the title. I love everybody. (:

* * *

I sometimes question why people care what others think.

To fit in? To be popular? Why would you want to be popular if people didn't like you for who you actually were?

Now, I'm not hating on people who do that, we all got our own security blanket or whatever and if yours is fitting in with the crowd, whatever, that's cool. And seriously, don't go thinking I'm one of those people who conform with the non-conformists.

Because with me, it's straight up whatever I want.

Call me a poser all you want but my phone is blatantly obvious in the front pocket of my skinny jeans and it'll probably be taken away by the teacher that keeps telling me to not wear tight pants if they're just going to fall off.

And you know what? I feel just fine.

Skinny Jean Faggots.

**-Child Abuse.**

"I have a confession," Sakura said as she sat down on the black love seat in Sasuke's living room.

"This should be interesting," Suigetsu replied, seated next to Karin on the floor in front of the couch. They had a bowl of Cheetos on the coffee table and, as a rule of the Uchiha family, if you had food-don't sit on the couch. Mikoto will kill you. _Slowly_. (and they thought Sasuke got it from his dad. HA.) Oddly enough, she didn't really care about drinks.

Sasuke returned to the living room with three sodas and a fruit punch Gatorade just before Sakura began her story. He passed out the sodas and, holding his Gatorade possessively, sat down next to Sakura on the love seat.

"Okay, so, yesterday I was walking, right? Yeah. And this little..._thing _appears and tries to grab my purse, and not just any purse but that really epic one with the zebra print. So, I kneed it in the stomach and it turns out it was an eight year old kid." Everyone was kind of silent for a moment.

"...You assaulted an eight year old?" Sasuke asked slowly, not sure he heard her right. She nodded in response.

"You're going to hell," Karin said. Suigetsu laughed.

_Chapter One;  
_**+A Beautiful Friendship**

**-He's Sasuke.**

Karin was walking through the mall, Sasuke trailing behind her, bored. He was only there to carry her bags, Sakura would have bought just as much as her and Suigetsu was a lazy prick.

Suddenly, she stopped and turned rapidly to face the Uchiha.

"You're Sasuke."

He raised an eyebrow at her. "Um...yeah?" She smiled brightly, turned and continued walking through the mall.

And that was that.

**-Asking Her Out 101.**

About two months ago, Sasuke was left alone with only his thoughts to keep him occupied (which was never really a good idea). After a while, he started to notice a repeated pattern in his thoughts.

_Hey, I'm kind of hungry. Maybe I should get something to eat. I wonder what Sakura's doing. Maybe I could call Itachi. Nah, he's probably with whats-his-face, the shark guy. I wonder what Sakura's doing. I'm still kind of hungry. Maybe Mumzy would fix me something if I asked. I wonder what Sakura's doing._

And so on. After staring at the cieling for what felt like an hour, he grabbed his phone.

**From: Sexy-Cakes  
To: Meh Lover**

_So...How do I ask Sakura out?_

**From: Meh Lover  
To: Sexy-Cakes**

_Does this mean you don't love me anymore, Sasu-cakes?  
I'll be over in 5. Stay gorgous. ;)_

By the time Suigetsu arrived, Sasuke was already regretting asking him.

"Okay," Suigetsu began. "First things first, why do you want to date Sakura?"

"Um...is this a trick question?" Sasuke asked in replied. Suigetsu rolled his eyes and shook his head. "Oh...because...I like her?"

"Are you sure?"

"...Yes." Suigetsu nodded.

"Okay, pick up lines are always good. Next time you see her, say something clever like 'Hey Sexy, come here often?'" Sasuke blinked at him. Twice.

"So, I'm convinced that your pants are cutting off circulation to your brain, and I'm thinking that maybe you should just leave." Suigetsu laughed and patted Sasuke on the head like he was a dog.

"How adorable. Seriously though. Pick up lines, then just be all cool like 'So, I was thinking, I know you and you know me, how about we go out for coffee sometime, sweet thang?', she'll be like putty in your hands, man." Sasuke nodded slowly. Suigetsu smiled and pulled out his phone. He sent a quick text. Sasuke raised an eyebrow and Suigetsu answered the unspoken question. "I just told Sakura to come over." Sasuke's eyes widened and he sputtered out nonsense. Suigetsu gave him a once over. "You should probably change."

Glancing down, Sasuke realized he was still wearing grey sweat pants and a yellow wife beater shirt. Ergo, what he slept in. He ran upstairs to his room to change. Suigetsu snorted.

Sasuke reemerged as Sakura walked in (no one bothered ringing the doorbell unless Fugaku's car was in the drive way). This time he was dressed in his favorite black skinnies and a black tee shirt with a band that no one's heard of on it. He stared at her for a minute.

"...Hey." Sakura raised a pink eyebrow.

"Um...hi?" They stared at each other awkwardly for a minute. Suigetsu had taken the time to slip out of the room before she had arrived. He was listening in from the kitchen. After a long, awkward, gay baby producing silence, Sasuke silently walked into the kitchen and beat Suigetsu until he cried Uncle.

He never asked Sakura out and to this day, Suigetsu is the only one that knows he likes her.

Sasuke remained kind of hungry until his father got home for dinner.

**-Anti Social.**

Suigetsu and Karin never even met Sakura until ninth grade. Before that, they just hung out with Sasuke and hadn't met any of his other friends. In eighth grade, they had this stupid Human Relations class that they all took because it was easy. Most of the assignments involved getting in groups and making videos.

They were supposed to get with people they could meet outside of school. As it turned out, they were the only group to have both boys and girls. They wrote out a script and filmed at Sasuke's house.

After that, nobody thought they were uncool nobodies that hated people. They just thought they were freaks.

Freaks with tight pants.

**-Meh Lover.**

Everyone gets a little more immature in high school and the same went for Suigetsu and Sasuke. Though Sasuke was a genius, that didn't stop him from acting like a normal fourteen year old would when they reached freshman year.

Suffice to say, Suigetsu was suddenly his "one true love" and Sasuke was Suigetsu's "booty on the side". At least, that's what they said.

And, because they were confident in their sexuality, they had no problems with hugging in public or making big romantic speeches about how "in love" they were.

Over time though, Sasuke became the pimp and Suigetsu was the man hoe. Karin became Sasuke's daughter and Sakura was his "love". The first time Sasuke addressed her as such, Suigetsu made sure to make a big scene about how he "thought they had something special."

Eventually, they made up.

**-Failure.**

The first time Sakura saw Sasuke freak out, she thought he was dying.

They were in English and he was sitting between her and Naruto, listening to Kakashi (he was one of the more laid back teachers and allowed them to call him by his first name) go on and on about how stupid some kid in his last class was. He stopped eventually and said something about handing back the test they took last Friday.

Naruto said something about how he probably failed and Sasuke said something about how _he_always made one hundreds and this time wouldn't be any different. Sakura rolled her eyes as Naruto yelling about Sasuke being a "teme". Sasuke rolled his eyes and tuned the blond out as he waited for his answer sheet to come back.

It was when that answer sheet came back that Sasuke's melt down started.

When Kakashi handed it to him, his eyes drifted to the number at the top lazily. Then, his eyes suddenly widened and he jumped up from his seat faster than Rock Lee can run a mile.

"No, no, no, no, no, no, this has to be a mistake," He said in horror before dropping to his knees and hanging his head in shame. "I'm a disgrace to my family! I shouldn't be allowed to live! Why? WHY? How could I let something like this happen?" No one really did anything until he started banging his head really hard on the chair he had just jumped out of.

As it turns out, Kakashi made a mistake and Sasuke actually made a one hundred instead of the ninety-eight he thought he had. Not that it really matters considering he had enough extra credit points to make up another two one hundreds.

**-And To Think He Did It All While Still Being Sexy**

"Hi, my name is Suigetsu Hozuki," Suigetsu said into the camera. He was dressed in an expensive-looking tux, his arms were crossed, and he had the most serious face he could manage. Then his arms flew apart and he yelled "AND THIS IS MY PARTY!" The scene changed to an opening which was a collage of Sasuke, Suigetsu, and Karin set to "House Party" by 3Oh!3. The scene changed after the song said "Sunday, you better find somebody else so for once I don't have to clean up after myself".

In the scene you saw a high class party with classical music in the background and guests (none of which were older than fourteen except a few parents) mingling with one another. The camera moved around until finally it stopped and was facing the door of the Uchiha house. The door opened and Sasuke walked in dressed in a suit. He walked up toward the camera and smiled.

In an incredibly fake cheery voice, he said "Hi, my name is Sasuke Uchiha, successful businessman. With more money than Bill Gates, it's a little shocking that I did it all within three years of my life. And to think I did it all while still being sexy." He gave two thumbs up and a cheesy smile that showed his teeth. The scene changes and he's standing in the kitchen. "You see, I wasn't always like this, shockingly rich and successful. Before you ask, yes. I have always always been this sexy.

"You see, I used to be what the other kids liked to call a 'douchebag', but I went from that," The video flashed a picture of Sasuke playing his guitar while looking like a typical douchebag. "To this. A successful business man with amazing hair. And to think I did it all while still being sexy." He crosses his arms and gives a smile and a wink.

The video changes to Karin, her hair in a high bun and in a business woman outfit, sitting down at the kitchen counter. "My name is Karin Kusa. I'm Mr. Uchiha's secretary...What? Oh no, I love this job. It pays really well and he's not one of those business people you actually call. He's just rich. And to think he did it all while still being sexy."

The scene changes again and shows Sasuke walking down the street. Karin and Suigetsu are there, now dressed like teenagers and walking next to their bikes. They stop as Sasuke passes.

"Hey," Suigetsu says. "Wasn't that Sasuke Uchiha, a successful businessman?"

"I think it was! And to think he did it all while still being sexy!"

The scene went back to Sasuke in the kitchen, this time he was drinking a Gatorade. At the bottom of the screen in yellow letters the words "SUBLIMINAL MESSAGING" flashed twice.

"Oh, hi. You're back. In case you've forgotten, I'm Sasuke Uchiha. Successful businessman. And I did it all while still being sexy. Do you want to know HOW I did it all while still being sexy? Well, you're in luck. Because now you can! All you have to do is buy my book titled 'Sasuke Uchiha: How He Went From Douche To Successful Businessman All The While Being Sexy and How There's No Conceivable Way That You Could Do It Too' and you can get wristbands that say 'WWSUSBDWDIAWSBSD?' or 'What Would Sasuke Uchiha Successful Businessman Who Did It All While Still Being Sexy Do?'"

He flashes another smile and the video changes to the credits.

**-She's Sakura.**

The year Sasuke, Karin, and Suigetu were moved to high school was quite possibly one of the worst years for the teachers at the school. For one thing, they had already taught Sasuke's brother, Itachi. They all hated him mainly because he was smarter than all of them. That vendetta against the elder Uchiha was passed on to Sasuke, who didn't even acknolledge their glares, which just kind of made them even more annoyed.

Teachers, amirite?

The first day of school was never that bad, it was just student meeting their teachers and classmates and unpacking.

It was, however, bad that they decided to put Sasuke in a class with Sakura, Karin, AND Suigetsu. It was simply chaos waiting to happen.

The mistake was realized with the usually brooding Uchiha saw Sakura and made a point to randomly brighten, scream "Sakura!", and run over and hug her. (and to think he did it all while still being sexy)

Suigetsu looked up from his spot next to Sakura when Sasuke ran over, screamed "Sasuke!", and proceeded to jump over his desk and hug Sasuke, who was still hugging Sakura, from behind.

Karin entered the classroom late and had no idea what was going on. Still, she ran over, screamed "Suigetsu!", and proceeded to join in the hug by hugging Suigetsu who was still hugging Sasuke who was still hugging Sakura.

Sakura had no idea what was going on and was only really aware of the fact that Sasuke was hugging her so she didn't honestly care what was going on.

The teachers didn't know what was going on either but eventually told them if they didn't stop hugging they'd get a PDA.

When they all separated, Sasuke looked from Suigetsu and Karin to Sakura repeatedly.

His eyes finally stopped on Suigetsu and Karin but he pointed at the pink haired girl and said "She's Sakura."

It was the beginning of a beautiful friendship.

**=The Real Slim Shady**

They all stayed at Sasuke's house for a little while, just hanging out and doing nothing. The doorbell rang randomly which was a little weird because they were all their and normally someone would say something if they were going to have guests. Sasuke stood up and answered the door. They were all silent as if a serial killer was at the door ready to chop off all their heads.

They couldn't see who was at the door but Sasuke walked back a minute later and said it was for Sakura. She looked at Karin, who shrugged. Suigetsu looked at them strangely because he didn't understand girl speak.

Sakura stood up and walked to the door, Sasuke behind her so if the person at the door _was_ a chain saw murderer, he could describe him to the police.

At the door was...the little boy Sakura had kneed in the stomach earlier that day.

The boy grinned triumphantly, and with a gap-toothed grin said "I knew you were here! See mommy, I told you!" Standing next to him was a women in maybe her early thirties.

"Uh...hi?" Sakura said, unsure.

"You need to apologize for kicking me with your knee!" He said. She stared at him for a minute.

"...But you tried to steal my pretty zebra print purse," She replied, pouting. The boy put his hands on his hips not realizing how unmanly it made him look.

"No I didn't! That guy took off running after he realized he didn't get it!"

All was silent for a few minutes.

"...Sorry?"

"That's more like it. Come on, Mommy. I'm done here." The woman followed him back to the car without a word. Sakura stared after them.

Sasuke mumbled something about stupid kids and warm Gatorade.

_Chapter One;  
_**A Beautiful Friendship.**

_(end)_

**AN. **So...that was chapter one. The update will probably be kind of sporadic because I seriously have no idea where this is going. If you're confused, almost none of the events are in order.


	2. Shun The NonBelievers

**AN.** I'm dedicating this chapter to my favorite black Tripp skinny jeans that have the studs on the pockets and the logo on the back pocket. I'm also going to dedicate it to the blue ones with the rhinestones on the back pockets just 'cause I wore those while I wrote the first part.

Thanks for all the reviews and alerts and such. (:

* * *

"OMG, why his jeans so tight?"  
"OM-OM-OMG, why his jeans so tight?"

Like yeah I rock skinnies,  
yeah I rock, yeah I, yeah I rock skinnies

So what?

Skinny Jean Faggots

**-Apartment Life.**

"Itaaaachiiii!" Karin sang as the quartet made their way into the oldest Uchiha brother's apartment. Itachi was sitting in _HIS_ kitchen, having breakfast. He wasn't expecting company.

"Um...hi?" She smiled brightly. "...What are you doing here?" He looked to Sasuke for an answer. He simply shrugged and walked over to his brother's fridge.

"We're visiting!" Sakura said.

"...Why?" He asked. She put her hands on her hips.

"What, friends can't just visit a friend?"

"You're my brother's friend."

"So I can't be friends with you too?"

"...I'm five years older than you," He replied. Sakura shrugged.

"That means nothing to me. I've got a few months on Sasuke, we're still friends," She argued.

"Five years is a little different that 'a few months'."

"You know what? This friendship is over." She huffed and turned to where her back was facing him. Itachi didn't know what was going on. Sasuke now had Gatorade.

_Chapter Two;  
_**+Shun The Non-Believers.**

**-She's Karin.**

Karin started out how most girls in Sasuke's life start out. As a _fangirl._Though it pains her to think of it now, that was how she used to be. She would try to sit next to Sasuke and Suigetsu, who tended to be on the other side of Sasuke, would make some smart-ass remark which would make her hit him, which would make him call her words you shouldn't say in school, which would get both of them sent to ISS and let Sakura and Naruto take the seats that were previously theirs.

You could say that happened a lot but it'd be a bit of an understatement.

Eventually, through her friend Juugo, Karin got on decent terms with Suigetsu. Suigetsu was friends with Sasuke. Suigetsu would invite her and Sasuke places so, eventually, they were all friends. Karin got over her crush on Sasuke once realizing he wasn't really what she had made him out to be (he was cool [and hawt], but definitely NOT Prince Charming).

Karin could still remember the really awkward day they hung out at the mall.

As it turned out, after all those years of trying to be noticed by the Uchiha, he had no idea who she was.

Suigetsu had to introduce her. All he said was "She's Karin."

And that was that.

**-Why Sasuke Can't Make Friends.**

Sasuke was a Mama's Boy. If you say anything about his mother that could be even the slightest bit offensive, he will cuss you out, no matter who you are (the one time Sakura said anything though, he just kind of glared at her).

It was kind of awkward though because any of Sasuke's friends that had an X and a Y chromosone that met his mom always said the exact same thing.

"Dude...Your mom's a MILF."

And that is more or less the reason most people don't talk to Sasuke more than once.

**-Pink Hair, Yo.**

Sakura's pink hair was more or less unexplainable.

Her dad had red hair and her mom had dirty blond, most people figured it was either dyed or by some unexplainable phenomenon, her parents hair colors mixed together to create a pink.

Most people just thought it was dyed.

**-Show Choir.**

Suigetsu, Karin, Sasuke, and Sakura always got together to decide on different classes to take. Most of the time, it was boring and educational, only the person who suggested it (which was more than likely Sasuke [the nerd]) would actually want to do it. They had a system though, if the person swore they wouldn't complain about the class and wanted to do it more than anything in the world, they'd do it.

But, since it was normally Sasuke who suggested it and he wasn't really passionate about anything, they almost never took overly boring classes.

Sasuke complained anyways.

It was a nice summer afternoon and they had gathered at Suigetsu's apartment when Karin said "Let's take show choir this year."

Suigetsu blinked and then proceeded to stare at her like she was crazy.

Sakura laughed, rolled her eyes, and continued looking through the choices for different classes.

Sasuke rolled his eyes too and started having a small conversation with Sakura about how the art teacher was one of his brothers friends and was freaking crazy so he refused to take art class.

Karin pouted. "Come on guys, I'm serious!"

Suigetsu was the first one to make a valid argument; "I've heard you sing. I'd rather my ear drums not bleed."

She was about to retort when Sasuke agreed with Suigetsu and then Sakura agreed too.

Then she just didn't say anything.

**-Emo Nerd Glasses.**

"Um...you look...nice, Sasuke." - Sakura.

"I'm not alone anymore!" - Karin.

"...Dude, the hell is that attacking your face?" - Suigetsu.

Sasuke directed his glare at Suigetsu from behind his new glasses. It wasn't like it was surprise that his eyesight was going. It had been going for quite sometime, Itachi finally caught on though.

Every Uchiha, even Uchihas that were only Uchihas by marriage, had bad eyesight.

Itachi had gotten glasses when he was thirteen, never wore them for almost a year, and then finally got contacts.

Sasuke managed to avoid getting his eyes checked until just last week and by that time, his eyes were so bad that he couldn't just not wear them and he'd have to wait two weeks to get his contacts.

"...They look...like emo nerd glasses," Suigetsu said. "But they could also be a ravenous kitten that's contorted itself to look like emo nerd glasses so it can eat your face."

"I think they're just emo nerd glasses," Sakura contributed.

"I think it's safe to say Sasuke's always been an emo nerd that hates animals, so I'm going to go with emo nerd glasses on that one," Karin said.

Sasuke rolled his eyes and growled.

Stupid emo nerd glasses.

**-Baby Got Back.**

"Oh my God, Sasuke. Look at her butt-."

"Just stop where you are, Suigetsu."

"Pffht, you're no fun."

"And you're an idiot."

**-WWSUSBWDIAWSBSD?**

"Oh hey, look. It's Sasuke Uchiha, successful businessman who did it all while still being sexy," Ami said as he walked down the hall.

He flashed her the same fake smile he used in the video, said "Buy my book!", and walked away.

**-Neon Hairbrush.**

"...Suigetsu, what's that?" Karin asked pointing at an object on his desk. She was over at Suigetsu's house so they could work on a project. Not that they ever actually worked on projects, they just kind of talked about it for two minutes, randomly spread out their textbooks as if getting ready to start, and then get sidetracked by something completely different.

Suigetsu looked over the where she was pointing and replied "That, Karin, is a hairbrush. You use it to brush hair." She rolled her eyes.

"I know what a hairbrush is used for, but why do you have one?"

"...Because I don't have a buzz cut?"

"Well, no, what? I confused myself...I mean why do you have a neon green hairbrush," She corrected.

"Again, to brush my hair," He replied. Karin rolled her eyes and let out a groan.

"But why is it NEON GREEN?"

"Oh, it's covered in duck tape. It used to be pink."

Karin decided that there wasn't really anything she could say to that and left it alone.

**-He's Suigetsu.**

"I'm Suigetsu." Karin looked up at the five year old who had just spoken to her. He was smiling brightly.

It was their first day of kindergarten.

The red head girl raised an eyebrow at him. "I'm Karin."

"Can I swing next to you?" Karin looked around to see if their were any stupid boys who might of put him up to this.

"I...guess," She said, not seeing anyone looking in their direction. He smiled again.

Later, Ino and Tenten asked who he was. Karin said "He's Suigetsu."

**-Gatorade.**

No one is all that sure when Sasuke's addiction to Gatorade began. Some speculate that it started when he was a small boy, that he'd had it once, forgotten, and had it again a few years later when he could form coherent sentences to ask for said Gatorade.

Some think his mom drank a lot of it while she was pregnant with him and it somehow stemmed from that.

Others think that it came from all the years of playing basketball for the school because they always drank Gatorade after a game.

No one is all that sure though, not even Sasuke himself. What everyone is sure of though-if you mess with Sasuke Uchiha's Gatorade, you will die.

Especially if it's Fruit Punch flavored.

**-Ensured Death.**

There are several things you can do to the four that will ensure you death.

With Sasuke, you could mess with his aforementioned Gatorade, say something horribly inappropriate about his mother, act like Itachi while not being Itachi which just makes you annoying, talk like Fred, make him fail a project, trash his car, spill something on him, say something horribly inappropriate about Sakura, INSULT HIS INTELLIGENCE, etc.

With Suigetsu it was harder. He was a typically laid back person so he didn't get annoyed easily. But, if you do something to piss him off, _run_. Or it's all over.

Like Sasuke, Karin was typically easy to annoy. She had a different kind of tolerance for her friends so they were mostly safe. However, you do NOT call her a slut, you do NOT call any of her friends sluts, and you definitely don't say anything about "The Princess Diaries" movies around her.

Sakura was similar to Suigetsu in the respect that she didn't get annoyed incredibly easily. If you were someone like Naruto, she got annoyed very easily with you though. And, despite popular belief, the pixie-like girl could in fact kick your ass with the right motivation. The 'right motivation' meaning being a douche or just annoying in general.

**=Personalized Hell.**

Growing up, Sasuke never really like his brother, but now that his brother had moved out, they were practically best friends. Sasuke had an issue with personal space but he also had an issue with being abandoned, so he tended to be over at Itachi's apartment...quite a lot. Eventually, with their mother working at her design studio and their father working long hours since his promotion from cop to detective, Sasuke just started going directly from school to the apartment.

Not that Itachi really minded, it was just his little brother and occasionally his friends.

Karin and Sakura had grown to see him as their [really pretty] older brother. But then Sasuke would say that was creepy because then _he'd_be their brother and Karin was creepy and with Sakura, he just didn't support ince-then he'd get cut up and stutter and have to drink some Gatorade and pretend he had no idea what he was going to say.

Then Itachi would give him this look like "ORLY?" and Sasuke would give him this look in reply like "YARLY."

Anyways, Itachi's house was kind of like their second home. It _was _Sasuke's second home, really.

"Hey, hey, Itachi. I've decided to forgive you," Sakura said the next time they appeared. This time, Itachi was sitting on the couch next to one of his friends. She didn't know his name. It started with a 'K'.

"I convinced her too," Karin said. "You should thank me. Sakura isn't really someone you want as an enemy."

"Uh...okay?"

Suigetsu walked in behind them, followed by Sasuke.

"Heyyy," He said in a bored tone. He then suddenly stopped and glanced at Itachi's friend. "KISAME!"

Itachi sighed. He _really_ needed to start remembering to lock his door.

_Chapter Two;  
_**Shun The Non-Believers.**

_(end)_

**AN. **Yay, chapter two. (: This time with Itachi!  
I figure a good bit of Naruto characters will be mentioned throughout this. The first section, after the authors note, is from the song "Cricketz" by New Boyz.

Oh, as a fun fact, I was wearing my black Tripp skinny jeans that I dedicated this to when I wrote the last half of this chapter. :D


	3. Challenging Stereotypes

**AN. **I'd say they're in like...Jersey or something. I dunno.

* * *

The eighties is now, bitch.

Grab your skinny jeans and lets party with sex, drugs, and rock 'n roll to the max.

_Fuckin' Radical._

Skinny Jean Faggots.

**-Asian Persuasion.**

"So...I have to do a project on Japan in Social Studies," Sasuke said. They were all sitting in his room, doing nothing. Sakura was sitting as his computer. Suigetsu thought his guitar was possessed and was staring at for any sides of Satan. Karin was flipping through some of Sasuke's old Alternative Press magazines. Sasuke was counting lines on the ceiling.

"That's very interesting, Sasuke," Sakura replied, sounding like an uninterested mother who's child just drew a really ugly rainbow.

"I think she's racist." Karin rolled her eyes.

"Sasuke, you think everyone is personally out to get your because you're _Asian_."

Suigetsu, still staring at the guitar, nodded his head in agreement. Sasuke glared at Karin.

"You don't understand, little girl."

"You-," She stopped. "...God, Sasuke, you're just an idiot."

"I'm not an idiot, you hoe!"

"Bitch, what did you just call me?"

"You heard me, slut!"

She hissed at him and he growled back. Suigetsu turned away from the guitar, laughed, and turned back to watch for any sign of movement.

_Chapter Three;  
_**+Challenging Stereotypes.**_  
_

**_-_Kids.**

"Father," Karin said to Sasuke while they were walking through the mall with Sakura. "I've decided to pursue a career in fashion design."

"..No, Karin. You will become a doctor like your mother."

"No, Dad! You can't control my life anymore! I hate you!" She made a point to run into the nearest Hot Topic. Sasuke and Sakura stood there staring at where she once stood.

"They grow up so fast," Sakura said.

"I know," Sasuke replied. "Let's have another."

**-Cat Hunting.**

Suigetsu was not happy. This _thing_ was challenging him and he was not happy about it. He was down on his knees, trying to get it come out from under the park bench.

"Here kitty, kitty," He cooed. "Come out and get some...grass." It was his neighbors cat. It had gotten out and she was offering a reward for anyone who could return it. He started to crawl under the bench after it.

The cat jumped away and ran up a tree.

Suigetsu was stuck under the bench until Hinata walked through the park and saw him.

**-Two Roads.**

"So...which way do we go?" Karin asked. She had just gotten her drivers license and was trying to drive her and Sakura to the mall. Sakura was turning the map every possible angle.

"I think...you go...right...or...is that left?" The car behind them honked, Karin made a point to stick her middle finger out the window as they decided to simply go around.

"Hey, where is the mall anyway?" Karin asked. Sakura looked up at her with wide eyes.

"...I thought you knew."

"You're the one with the map, idiot." Sakura glared at her.

"We're screwed." Karin decided to go right.

.

.

"...Did that sign just say we're in Kentucky?"

"_Shit._"

**-Karin Skinnies.**

"I freaking want these." Karin said, eyeing some black and white checkered skinny jeans. Her mother raised an eyebrow at her.

"How much are they?" The thirteen year old checked the price tag.

"Fourteen dollars," She replied. Her mother shrugged.

"Okay, fine."

And with that, Karin bought her first pair of skinny jeans.

**-Shuffle-suke.**

"_**Breathe. **They will turn their backs on me, unless I decide to **breathe. **You will forget me, unless I **breathe...I've seen the worst in myself, tonight**_-"

Suigetsu hit the off button on the stereo and glared at Sasuke.

"Dude...Why did you do that?" The dark haired boy asked.

"You know very well that I don't do screamo," He replied. Sasuke rolled his eyes.

"Yeah, but I do and this is my room, so turn it back on." Suigetsu continued to glare at him until Sasuke stood up and turned it back on himself.

"Freaking douche."

**-Colored Pencils.**

In second grade, Sasuke and Sakura had finished with their addition problems early so they got to color an addition worksheet. Basically, you did the basic addition problems and then colored it in based on a code.

Sasuke had these really awesomesauce colored pencils while Sakura still had crayons.

They were sitting in the back of the room, done with all the addition, when Sakura asked if she could borrow a pink colored pencil.

Sasuke replied with "But there isn't a pink on the color code, why do you need it?" She showed him her sheet where she had marked out the colors it was supposed to be and wrote in new colors.

"There is on mine," She replied.

Sasuke, who had lived in a box that had "always do what you're told" written on it in thick, permanent sharpie, was shocked that she would do that but gave her the colored pencil anyways because that was prettyfreaking_sweet_.

**-Conversationalists.**

"Hey Itachi," Sasuke said as he walked through the door of the Uchiha house, Sakura following behind him.

Itachi gave him a nod in acknowledgement.

Sasuke rolled his eyes. "Hn," He said.

"Aa."

"Tch."

"Hn."

Sasuke narrowed his eyes and hissed at his older brother. Itachi simply rolled his eyes.

There were silent for about two minutes, the only sound coming from the TV Itachi was watching. Nobody moved.

"You know what?" Sasuke said, breaking the silence. "_Screw you._"

He then dragged an utterly confused Sakura upstairs to is room and slammed the door behind him.

**-Standardized Testing.**

Everyone dreaded taking the state test each year. The desks are arranged in a fashion that is somehow annoying, you're forced to use number two pencils and if you don't have one the teacher will give you one that usually has a really crappy eraser, it's always multiple choice so there's only a 25 percent chance you'll get it right, and the teachers are always really obnoxious.

But, what was possibly the worst part, was that they had to sit in _alphabetical order._Sakura Haruno. Suigetsu Hozuki. Karin Kusa. Sasuke Uchiha.

Sasuke was practically on the other side of the room, sitting right in front of Naruto Uzumaki and Ino Yamanaka who would sit there giggling like school girls until the teacher finally told them to stop. With the way the desks were arranged, Suigetsu and Sakura would always be the first two in a row with Hinata Hyuuga and Kiba Inuzuka sitting behind them. Karin would start a new row and therefore be sitting right next to Sakura.

And where was Sasuke? Sitting in front of two _really_ annoying people and he can't turn around and tell them to shut up because the teacher just said anyone who turns around in their seat will get an automatic office referral.

Standardized testing was most definitely _not_ fun.

**-His Name is Fluffy.**

"Karin...why is there a snake wrapping itself around my arm?" Sasuke asked, staring at the creature. Karin looked over at him.

"Ah crap-Fluffy! No! Get off of Sasuke! Bad!" Sasuke continued to stare at it.

"I suddenly feel really violated and I'm going to have to ask you to get this off of me," He said in monotone. The redhead rolled her eyes and got the snake off of him. She went upstairs to her bedroom to put Fluffy back in his cage.

When she returned to the living room, Sasuke was doing his math homework.

"There," She said. "That's taken care of."

"Karin, why do you have a snake?"

"Remember our seventh grade science teacher?" She asked. Without waiting for an answer because she knew very well that Sasuke had _not_forgotten the creepy snake-like man who may or may not have tried to rape him, she continued. "He gave it to me. He said Fluffy's mom went to his old favorite student-Kabuto or whatever."

Sasuke nodded slowly. "And it's name is Fluffy because...?"

She shrugged. "When I was four, I had this snake plushie and I named it Fluffy."

"Lovely," Sasuke replied sarcastically.

"Yup."

**-Po-Po.**

It was the first day of Kindergarten and all of the children were running around, playing and making new friends. All except Sasuke Uchiha who was sitting as his assigned desk, coloring a race car.

The teacher eventually asked them all to calm down and take a seat, which they did. Most of the children were already six years old except three or four that would turn six during the school year and the one or two that had to wait til summer.

Sasuke was one of the ones that would be waiting til summer. He wasn't very sociable and didn't want to talk to the kids who were older than him.

The teacher decided they would go around the room telling each other a little bit about themselves. They had to share there favorite food, what they hope to accomplish in school, and what they want to be when they grow up.

Most of the kids said generic things like cake and cookies, having fun and making friends, and president or princess.

When it got to Sasuke, he decided not to waste a full sentence on the question, it was _kindergarten_for goodness sake. "Tomatoes, make good grades like my nii-san*****, and a police officer like my tou-san*****."

The teacher just kind of nodded and moved on the blond boy who was sitting next to him.

That kid was going to be a handful.

**-Remote.**

"Yo, yo, yo," Suigetsu said, walking around the living room aimlessly. His cousin had just walked in the door. "Where's the remote?"

Kisame rolled his eyes. "Where did you put it?"

"'Where did you put it'," Suigetsu mimicked in a high-pitched voice. "You say that like that wasn't the first place I looked.

"I don't sound like that," Kisame grumbled. "Well, what did you do after you supposedly put down the remote?"

"I got a sandwich," He replied. Kisame gave him a pointed look and Suigetsu went into the kitchen.

He still swears he left it on the coffee table and that someone planted it in the fridge.

**-Spirit Week: Tacky Day.**

Tacky day was quite possibly the most...interesting of all spirit week days. A good 700 kids who all look ridiculously stupid.

This year, Sakura was dressed in pale skinny jeans with neon pink short-shorts over them. She was wearing a lime green long sleeve shirt with an orange sleeve jacket over it. She also had neon blue converse.

Sasuke didn't do spirit week.

Karin had on a long sleeve black and white striped turtleneck with a purple tank top over it. She was also wearing neon pink skinny jeans and neon green converse. She had an orange ribbon tied around her neck to resemble a choker necklace.

Suigetsu... Oh, Suigetsu...He was wearing a pink plaid shirt dress with pink skinny jeans under it. He had pink flats and pink jelly bracelets on each wrist. Top top it off, he had a thick, neon blue belt tied right under where his chesticles would be.

**=Hoe.**

Sasuke and Karin continued throwing insults back and forth, using some very colorful words.

"Will you guys shut up already?" Sakura asked after it had been going on for forty minutes. "You're getting really annoying, it's not even funny." They both turned to glare at her and then made a point to continue arguing, this time louder. "Freaking hoes," Sakura muttered.

Suigetsu was still staring at the "possessed" guitar. The room was filled with Sasuke and Karin's now-loud arguing and Sakura tapping on the computer keyboard.

That was before Suigetsu let out a very loud shriek and yelled "SATAN!" Everyone stopped what they were doing and stared at him. One of the strings on Sasuke's guitar had snapped.

Said Uchiha rolled his eyes, "You idiot, the string was just to tight." He turned back to Karin. "Now, where were we?"

"...What were we even fighting about?"

"You say that like I actually remember."

"Well maybe you should remember, Sasuke."

"Maybe you should've remembered, Karin."

"Oh God, shut up!" Sakura yelled. "First you're insulting each other because Sasuke's stupid, now you're fighting because you're BOTH stupid!"

Sasuke turned to glare at her. "I'm _not _stupid, Sakura. Take it back." She glared back at him.

They sat there like that for a good twenty minutes before Sasuke twitched. Then Sakura started yelling about how she won.

Moral of the story? All four of them are stupid except Sasuke because he gets annoying when you say he is.

_Chapter Three;  
_**Challenging Stereotypes.**

**AN. **Fun chapter. Spirit week starts tomorrow at my school. It might be a while before I update because of school, but what do I know?

*****Sasuke uses "nii-san" (older brother) and "tou-san" (father) because he was raised to use Japanese suffixes. The way I see it is that when he was young, his parents moved him to America [I mean like three or four] and they taught him Japanese and English.

As you can see, I have a lot of time on my hands to think about this stuff. Normally during commercial breaks for House. [:


	4. Dressed to Impress

**AN. **I've had a pretty shitty week and haven't been thinking in hyperactivity. I really _hate_ people sometimes. BLEGH.

* * *

The pants don't lie.

(they have no room too.)

Skinny Jean Faggots.

**-Cellular Phones.**

"Sakura, your house has horrible service," Karin said, slightly annoyed. She was holding her phone up at different levels and walking around the room trying to find a signal. "Juugo is going to think I forgot about him at this rate."

Sakura rolled her eyes. "Go toward Sasuke's hair, I always find a signal there," She replied, sarcastically. The redhead held her phone toward the Uchiha's hair anyways.

"Oh, hey, it totally worked!"

Sasuke twitched.

_Chapter Four;_  
**+Dressed to Impress.**

**-Eraser Complications.**

"Oi, oi, Sasuke," Sakura whispered, poking him awake with her pencil. They were supposed to be taking notes, but that implies that Sasuke actually takes notes. He doesn't, but the teachers think he does because he makes such good grades. Fo sho.

"What?" He hissed back.

"Can I borrow your pencil? My eraser died." He rolled his eyes but slid her his pencil anyways. "...Sasuke, your eraser is buried six feet under, I need an eraser. Mine _died._"

"Maybe you shouldn't mess up then," He grumbled.

She hit him with a textbook.

**-Classic.**

"Why do I hear a piano?" Suigetsu asked, as he walked into the Uchiha house, followed by Karin and Sakura.

Mikoto Uchiha appeared to answer his question. "Oh, hi, Sasu-chan has piano lessons right now, you can wait in the living room if you like," She said politely. They all shrugged in unison, and went into the living room.

Roughly twenty minutes later, Sasuke appeared in the living room, Gatorade in hand. "Um...hi?"

"Piano? Really?" Suigetsu asked, snickering. Sasuke glared at him.

"_Shut_ up, you uncultured douche-nozzle."

**-Shuffle-getsu.**

The most disturbing thing Sakura ever saw in her life was Suigetsu dancing and singing to Lady Gaga.

The second most disturbing this was Suigetsu and Sasuke arguing over who was better- Lady Gaga or Ke$ha. Suigetsu started singing "Just Dance" really loudly, and Sasuke countered it by singing "Dinosaur" even louder. No one is all that sure who won that argument.

The third most disturbing thing she ever saw was Suigetsu's room, decorated almost entirely in Lady Gaga posters with very few spaces of blue wall left uncovered.

He also knew all the words to "Telephone", "Paparazzi", "Monster", "Poker Face", "Bad Romance", "Alejandro", "Speechless", "Starstrukk", and "Lovegame"

In general, Suigetsu was one of the more disturbing things Sakura has seen in her life.

**-Spirit Week: Group Day.**

Group day was when you got a group of people and all dress up like each other. Sasuke still didn't do spirit week, so he was just kind of there.

Karin, Suigetsu, and Sakura were all in a group together along with a few others. They were all crayons. Karin was the red crayon, Sakura was the pink crayon, and Suigetsu was the purple crayon. Naruto was the orange crayon and Ino was the yellow.

As it turned out, Sasuke had a tendency to where a lot of black. A _lot _of black. Seriously. So, what happened when he got to school was Sakura attacked him and writing "CRAYOLA" on his plain black shirt with a metallic sharpie, therefore making him the black crayon. Hinata was a blue crayon, Kiba was a brown crayon, and Shino was a useless white crayon. Rock Lee was a green crayon, but that didn't really matter considering he was a grade ahead of them.

For the most part, they were actually pretty frucking epic, tho'.

**-Stupid.**

Sasuke was not stupid. People had a tendency to think he was, but it was simply not true. For the most part. Sure, he might be immature, slightly childish, and ignorant to most things that don't directly involve him, but he was _not_ stupid.

(for the most part)

So when...Actually, nothing really happened that would make Sasuke think about how he was not stupid except Sakura calling him stupid, but she did that everyday.

...He wasn't stupid though.

**-Sakura Skinnies.**

She so freaking wanted the pink ones. Seriously, could anything possibly be better than pink jeans? They would look so totally awesome with her new Breathe Carolina shirt and her black flats with the little bow thing. Fo sho.

And everybody knows that pink non-skinny jeans would just look...stupid? Yeah. A giant blob of pink flaring out from you knee could not possibly look good.

And she so freaking wanted the pink ones.

So she told her mom, "Mom, I so freaking want the pink ones."

"Sakura...pink jeans? Really?" She nodded.

"It's not like it's my shirt so it can't blend in with my hair 'cause it only goes down my back," She replied. It was true; her bubblegum pink hair cascaded down her back but then stopped about half way.

After a few more hours of begging for the pink jeans, her mother dragged her out of the store and back to the car where she got the silent treatment. After realizing her mother was rather enjoying the silence, she resorted to answering all questions of where they should go for vacation with something like "Oh, we should go to Washington andbuymesomepinkskinnyjeans."

Eventually, they drove all the way back to the mall through traffic and Sakura Haruno bought her first pair of skinny jeans.

**-Closet.**

Karin and Suigetsu were waiting for Sasuke and Sakura at the mall. They were taking their time. And, as always, if you leave Karin and Suigetsu alone-they're going to argue. Even more so if they're annoyed from waiting for someone for half and hour.

In all honesty, the fight was really stupid and doesn't even deserve to be looked into. What _does _deserve that attention that could have been spent involving something about puppies and cornflower, is that after a while, people began staring, so, to avoid the people, Karin dragged Suigetsu into an abandoned janitor's closet near the food court where they were previously waiting.

Sasuke and Sakura arrived later only to discover that no one was there waiting for them. As it turns out, they took the table right near the janitor's closet.

So, when they walked out, the first thing they heard was Sasuke saying "Do I want to know what you were doing in there?"

And Sakura adding on, suggestively, "_Alone?_"

No one knows what went on in that closet (with the exception of Suigetsu and Karin) to this very day.

**-Sharpies.**

"Guys," Sakura said, her head dropped in shame and regret. "I have something to say."

"This should be interesting," Suigetsu muttered, which earned him an elbow to the ribs delivered via Karin.

"I let my guard down for two seconds...and somebody stole my lime green sharpie." Several gasps were heard around the room, mainly Suigetsu doing seven different sounding gasps for dramatic effect. Sasuke looked at Sakura like she was insane.

"...Sakura, I clearly remember you leaving your green-"

"_Lime_ green."

"Yeah, lime green, whatever," Sasuke corrected. "Anyways, I clearly remember you leaving your _lime_ green sharpie on your desk in homeroom and when I tried to tell you, you told me to shut up, put a hand over my mouth, and then dragged me away to the chorus room."

(Here, Karin muttered something along the lines of "Bitches taking chorus without me." and then retreated to the emo side of the couch.)

She stared at him.

"...Oh."

**-Txt Tlk, yo.**

**From: Saki-babeh  
To: Sexy-cakes !**

ok, 1st, it was rly weird lking in my fone 4 sme1 by the nme of sexy-cakes.  
2nd, sht up, my t9 isnt wrking and i dnt feel lyk typin out wrds. k?

anywys, cme ovr, i got duct tape. fo sho.

**From: Sexy-cakes !  
To: Saki-babeh**

...what?

**-The List.**

So, what was quite possibly the stupidest thing to ever happen at school was _The List._ It listed the top five cutest guys and girls and, if people wanted to know why they didn't get chosen, the mysterious creators had a box where you would write your name and they'd tell you why you weren't chosen. Sometimes, it was nice things like "Oh, you were in the top ten, just not the top five." and people knew it was true because other people got things like "...you're just ugly."

The stupidest thing about The List was that it gave the reasons why so and so was chosen so everyone suddenly tried to fit the criteria.

Anyways, this year's list was more or less the most surprising.

SENIOR BOYS:  
cinco: Kiba Inuzuka _Yeah, he can be a little...meh, but when it comes down to it-he has wild hair like a rockstar, but unlike a rocker, he loves his adorable dog more than anything._  
quarto: Shikamaru Nara _That's right, CLOUD BOY. Surprised? You shouldn't be. No matter how "troublesome" it may be, he's hot, and there's a reason he gets all the ladies._  
tres: Naruto Uzumaki _He's cute and has an amazing personality. Definite win._  
dos: Sai -no last name on file- _Dark hair, dark eyes, and showered in mysteriousness. YUMMY._  
uno: Sasuke Uchiha _I'm sure you're sitting there right now thinking, "Emo kid is number one? WTF?" but I swear, under that baggy hoodie is not a fat guy like you all thought, but a seventeen year old with a six pack._

SENIOR GIRLS:  
cinco: Matsuri -some foreign name, freaking exchange students- _Yeah, not the sharpest tool in the shed, but she..has pretty eyes?_  
quarto: Karin Kusa _Lose the glasses, and you seriously have a model on your hands._  
tres: Hinata Hyuuga _She may be shy, but this girl is soo pretty._  
dos: Sakura Haruno _She says it's natural. Most people would look soo stupid with pink hair, but it totally works for her._  
uno: Ino Yamanaka _Awesome personality, awesome fashion sense, awesome hair. Did you expect anyone else?_

Sasuke decided to send them a message.

[Anonymous: WHY THE FUCK ISN'T HARUNO NUMBER ONE?]

**-Fire Drill.**

Every month, the school is required to do a fire drill. The bad thing was that they always waited til the last minute, and it just so happened that on the last day of the month-it was scheduled to rain.

So, trying to beat the rain, the fire drill was held during first period. Everyone woke up at the annoying sound and walked outside slower than they normally would.

As it turns out, they didn't beat the rain at all, but instead went out almost the exact moment it started. It got heavy really quickly, making them all run back inside and try to shield their hair with their arms.

By sixth period, the rain had completely stopped and didn't show any signs of starting again.

But Sasuke's hair was flat the entire day.

**-Dress.**

The high school had several different dances, normally focused on a certain grade level. Prom was only for juniors and seniors, unless they invited a sophomore or a freshman. So, during the year, they would have freshman dances and sophomore dances, and then at the end of the year, they'd have something for the entire school.

Sasuke, Karin, Suigetsu, and Sakura decided to go in a group as friends (even though it could easily be misinterpreted as a double date).

Suigetsu and Sasuke were dressed simply. Suigetsu had a light blue button-up shirt and black pants. Sasuke was wearing his favorite black skinnies and a short sleeved black button up shirt. They were both wearing converse because they're not that classy.

Karin, however, went with a short blue dress that ruffled at the bottom; it went a little above her knees. It was accompanied by black hooker heels (which Sasuke hated because it made her a lot taller than him, and he was _so not short.)_. Sakura had on a simple strapless black dress that seemed to shimmer. It flared out a bit at the bottom and reached her knees. She was wearing red heels that weren't quite as high as Karin's but were close.

It was a total coincidence that they happened to match with Suigetsu and Karin in blue and Sasuke and Sakura in black.

"Hey Sasuke," Sakura greeted. "Suigetsu." Suigetsu lifted up a hand in a lazy wave.

"Well, let's get this party started, yo," He said, dragging Karin to his car.

Sakura smiled and grabbed Sasuke's hand, "Let's go, Uchiha!" she said, happily, dragging him toward the car.

It took everything Sasuke had to not blush 'cause OMG, Sakura was totally holding his hand.

**=Internet Connection.**

"Why isn't the fucking internet workinggg?" Suigetsu asked/whined. Karin rolled her eyes.

"Did you try restarting it?" She asked. He looked at her like she was insane.

"_'Did you try restarting it?'_" He mocked. "...No, no, I didn't." While he waited for the computer to reboot, he turned to Karin. "So... do you like...style your hair to stand up like that on the right or can it just not be commanded?"

She looked up and sent him a glare. Sasuke and Sakura were watching from the sidelines.

"Riight," Suigetsu replied, turning back to the computer. He tried to open the Internet again. "It's still not working."

Karin groaned. "Sasuke, come here." The Uchiha reluctantly got up and walked to the other side of the room where the computer was.

"_What?_" He hissed. She smiled sweetly before grabbing his head and all but shoved it toward the computer.

"Suigetsu, press F5," She said. He refreshed the page.

"Oh, hey, it totally worked!"

Sasuke twitched. Again.

_Chapter Four;  
_**Dressed to Impress**

_(end)_


	5. Don't Call My Name

**AN. **OWNED. The Chapter 1 person is back because he's awesomesauce AND HEY, HE HAS A NAME.

* * *

Whenever I try to say something awesome, I always forget what I'm going to say and then I remember it later and think

"Shit, I could've been considered awesome by everyone who happened to be around at the moment I was talking to whoever and needed to say this awesome thing which I had forgotten but now remember."

Well you know what, screw that. If I have think of things to say before hand, then I'm probably not awesome in the first place.

But then I say screw that because I'm Kakashi Fuckin' Hatake and he's more awesome than your mom.

Fo sho.

Skinny Jean Faggots._  
_

**-Livid Insanity.**

"Sakura," Sasuke hissed. She turned to him and made a hand motion that said "you're too loud, shut up"

"_What?_" she hissed back in a quieter voice.

Sasuke rolled his eyes, lightly. In a softer whisper, he asked her "_What the fuck are we doing?_"

This time Sakura rolled her eyes. "_Well obviously, we're stalking Naruto and Hinata on their date, Sasuke._"

"Yeah, bu-"

"SHH!"

"_Yeah, but why?_" He asked.

"_Because Naruto is romantically awkward and Hinata is socially, romantically, and physically awkward. If they mess up, we can fix it._"

"_We're hiding in bushes._"

"_If we weren't hiding in bushes, they'd know we're here,_" she replied.

Someone cleared their throat. "Actually," a male's voice started. "We already know you're there." Sasuke and Sakura slowly looked up to see Naruto, arm's crossed, looking down at them with one eyebrow raised, and Hinata, standing slightly farther back and off to the side, blushing and quietly fidgeting with her hands.

"RUN SASUKE, SAVE YOURSELF!" Sakura screamed. Nobody moved, actually they all just kind of looked at her.

"...Sakura," Sasuke began, the look of "Dear God, why do I like this insane person?" slowly removing itself from his features. "...Shut up."

"You shut up, Sasuke."

Sasuke sighed. "You're annoying."

"You're annoying, Sasuke." His eye twitched and he grabbed her hand and pulled her out of the bush. They were both covered in small green leaves. He dragged her all the way back to his house.

"...And _we're_romantically awkward?" Naruto asked Hinata, getting a shrug in response.

_Chapter Five;  
_**+Don't Call My Name.**

**-Sasuke Skinnies.**

Sasuke Uchiha did not like loose clothes. Don't ask him why, he just _didn't. like. them._ The exception would be his basketball uniform, but that didn't matter at the moment because he doesn't start playing basketball until seventh grade.

When he was six, his mom would pick out his clothes-as mothers do. He was wearing these loose white shorts and a baggy black shirt. Now, most people would say they hate tight clothes, but Sasuke would beg to differ. They were much more comfortable.

Yes indeed.

So, as he was dragged around by his mother, who always brought him along on her little shopping missions, something about Itachi growing up and his father always suddenly having something to do whenever she asked, he saw this thing called "skinneh genes".

He asked his mother what it was. She replied, "Those are girl jeans, sweety."

"Oh."

.

.

.

When Sasuke turned fourteen, his mother dragged him to the mall, but this time let him wander on his own. He walked into Hot Topic because they had this awesomesauce Invader Zim shirt that he totally _needed_. (that's not to say Sasuke was a Hot Topic virgin, Itachi had dragged him in their all the time when he was younger because that fish guy worked there. Sasuke swore his brother had a man-crush, wanted a bromance, ifyouknowwhati'msaying).

The point is, Hot Topic tends to have deals where you can get skinny jeans for thirteen dollars rather than the usual twenty dollars, so Sasuke, who's has a lot of money because he's Sasuke UCHIHA, bought some skinny jeans (and the Invader Zim shirt, in case you were wondering).

**-Teenage Dream.**

"So," Karin said, plainly.

"...So," Suigetsu replied. They were, to put it simply, _bored as shit_.

"We should do something," the redhead suggested. Suigetsu nodded. They sat in silence for several minutes.

"We should totally try out for the news thing at school."

"And be on the morning announcements?"

"Yeah."

"...Let's do it." They high fived, epically.

When they tried out on Monday, the teacher thought they had so much spirit that she let them be the anchors everyday.

**-You Wanna Be On Top?**

"...Um...Karin?" Suigetsu asked, slightly afraid. "Sakura?" Sasuke was behind him, hiding.

Well, he wasn't really hiding, he was too short to see over Suigetsu, but whatever.

"What's going on?" he asked. Suigetsu moved out of the way, so Sasuke could see. The Uchiha's eyes widened. "Is that...?"

"Yes. Cycle thirteen."

Nobody said anything, the only noise was coming from the television Karin and Sakura were sitting in front of.

"...This is totally my favorite."

"That's because they made all the models 5'7 and under and makes you feel like maybe Tyra Banks will let you be a model too."

"Seriously? I'm not that short. So shut up."

"I assure you Sasuke, you're really fucking short." Sasuke smacked the back of Suigetsu's head.

"See? You couldn't even do that without jumping."

"Will you guys shut up?" Sakura asked. "Sasuke, you _are_short for a guy, especially when you're standing next to Suigetsu who's like, the tallest person I know. Now both of you shut up, we're watching America's Next Top Model."

Sasuke dropped his head in shame.

**-Love Like Woe.**

"Oi, oi, Teme!" Naruto said, loudly. Which, in theory, probably wasn't the wisest decision when you're sitting in the middle of a Japanese class and you just said something that can be translated to "bastard" even though that's not really what it means, but it's an insult anyways, so it's not very nice.

The teacher started yelling at him.

Sasuke rolled his eyes, muttering "_Usuratonkachi_."

After Naruto "apologized", he continued talking with what he was saying to Sasuke. "So, a little birdie told me that somebody likes you." He wiggled his eyebrows, suggestively.

"...Look around you, idiot," He replied. Naruto did as told, and saw most of the girls in the room staring at Sasuke.

"Oh...I always thought they were looking at me. Well, whatever, it's someone you converse with regularly," he said. Sasuke raised an eyebrow.

"Karin?"

"..."

"Yeah, kind of obvious there."

"I dislike you."

**-Shuffle-ra.**

"Sakura." She glanced over to Sasuke, and then looked away. "Saaakura...Sakura...Sak...Sakura!...Sakura?" This continued on for several minutes, and when Sakura figured he really wasn't going to give up, she turned to him, glaring.

"Yes, Sasuke?"

"...Can I borrow your ipod?"

"Really? Are you serious?" She asked, venom seeping into her words. "No 'sorry'?"

He sighed. "Sorry."

"For?"

"For saying Simple Plan sucked." She patted him on the head.

"Good boy. Why do you need my ipod?"

"To make sure the new Mayday Parade album doesn't suck." She gasped.

"Sasuke, nothing Derek Sanders sings can suck." He shrugged.

"Yeah, but with Jason gone, they might not be as good."

"IF YOU LIKE JASON SO MUCH, LISTEN TO GO RADIO!" She screamed, before standing up and leaving. Sasuke was really confused and slightly disturbed.

**-This Has Been 22 Minutes Of Your Life That You'll Never Get Back.**

"Hi, I'm Karin."

"And I'm Suigetsu."

Then in unison: "And this. Is. The. MORNING ANNOUNCEMENTS!"

"And as 'morning announcements' implies," Karin continued by herself. "We will be talking about school stuff." The words "school stuff" appeared at the bottom of the screen in big red letters, accompanied by a deep yelling voice repeating the words.

"The football team won. The volleyball team won. The baseball team lost-badly. Today is Monday. I love you. This has been School Stuff with Suigetsu Hozuki."

**-But You Can Call Him Agent P.**

"What'cha watchinnn?" Karin asked as she walked into Sasuke's house, Suigetsu following behind her. Sakura was already there and her and Sasuke were staring at the TV screen.

"Phineas and Ferb," They replied in a unison monotone.

"That's...nice."

And with that, Suigetsu and Karin walked out of the house.

Suigetsu swore he saw Sasuke's guitar staring at him from the upstairs window. ["it must be possessed!"]

**-Spirit Week: School Colors.**

The school colors were black and green, and everybody agreed that it could've been much, much worse. Rock Lee didn't even need to dress up because he literally always wore green. No lie.

Sakura went simple with a green shirt, black skinny jeans, and black flip flops.

Karin wore black skinny jeans along with her volleyball team shirt.

Sasuke was unintentionally dressed up, wearing all black. Suigetsu was the exact opposite, wearing all green. Suigetsu had two black stripes painted on his face and, as always, someone raped Sasuke. This time it was Suigetsu who put two green stripes on his face.

**-Mister Hatake.**

The school made a note to not put the four into another class together, so only Sasuke and Sakura had gotten Kakashi, but with the addition of Naruto-it still wouldn't be good. Conviently, they were placed in the order of Sakura, Sasuke, Naruto, and then Ino was at the other end.

No one was all that sure why Sakura was there when everyone else was in alphabetical order but no one questioned it.

All in all, with a laid back teacher such as Kakashi-it'd be an interesting senior year.

**-LOL Limewire.**

Okay. So Sakura lied.

The scariest thing Sakura ever saw was definitely the Lady Gaga vs Ke$ha argument Suigetsu and Sasuke had. Not the first one with "Dinosaur" and "Just Dance", but the fifty-second one with shutter shades where they were singing "We R Who We R" and "Bad Romance". [to be clear, they didn't sing in every one]

She didn't actually personally witness this one-it was on youtube.

She didn't even know it was going to be them at first, Karin linked it to her through facebook. The music to "Bad Romance" started first.

When the singing started, you couldn't actually see anyone until it got to the first "Gaga, ooh lala". She laughed at first, because Suigetsu was wearing pink shutter shades and it was just kind of funny.

Then it was something like, "Dude, shut the fuck up, Lady Gaga sucks."

"Excuse me Sasuke, but what do you know?"

"That Ke$ha is full of awesomesauce, duh." To clarify, Sasuke was wearing blue shutter shades.

After about thirty seconds of random babbling, the music to "We R Who We R" started.

It was funny too, honest.

Sasuke singing "hot and dangerous, if you're one of us then roll with us, 'cause we make the hipsters fall in love, we got our hot pants on and up," and so on. But something about it was just...far to disturbing for words.

Maybe it was the man hug at the end. Maybe it was the fact that they both sounded _good _singing Lady Gaga and Ke$ha.

All Sakura knew was that she would never be the same.

**-Colored Paper.**

"Okay, everyone, I just thought you all should know that I, Karin Kusa, have just bought the single most amazing thing in the world," Karin announced, standing up on a stool that was in Suigetsu room.

Sakura rolled her eyes. "Please Karin, I have a _lime green sharpie._"

"And I have Gatorade," Sasuke said.

"Okay, one," Suigetsu began. "_I _have a purple hair tie, seriously, and two, nobody cares, Sasuke. Nobody ever cares about you because we all secretly hate you." Sasuke pouted and laid his head on Sakura's shoulder who pet his hair to make him feel better.

"Um, yeah, that's nice guys, but _I_ have _colorful paper_," Karin said, redirecting the conversation to herself. Eyes around the room widened.

"Wait, like _neon_?" Sasuke asked.

"As neon as Sakura's hair. In fact, some of it's pink!" She replied.

"That. Is. _Awesome,_" Suigetsu said. "I'm stealing it later, hoe."

"WOAH, BUT IS ANY OF IT _LIME GREEN_?" Sakura asked.

"Yup," Karin replied.

"Screw you all."

**=Some Kind Of Love.**

"I officially hate leaves," Sasuke stated, pulling another leaf out of his hair, and then noticing about six others that he could've sworn weren't there before. Sakura laughed. They were sitting in Sakura's bathroom, picking the leaves from the bushes off their clothes and out of their hair.

"Leaves seem to really like your hair gel, Sasuke," She replied. They didn't say anything after that and fell into a comfortable silence. Sakura's mom was still working so they were there by themselves.

After another ten minutes of silence, Sasuke let out a sigh of relief, all of the leaves finally leaving his hair.

Sakura smiled, almost laughing. "You still have a few in the back." Sasuke did a low scream and contemplated hitting his head on the nearest hard object. He flipped his head over and ruffled all the hair that was sticking up in the back. He saw a couple leaves fall from his hair, and flipped his head back right-side up. His hair was a mess, but there was no sign of green anywhere in his hair.

Sakura, who had gotten everything out of her hair, quite some time earlier, started laughing.

Sasuke glared, and growled out "_What_?"

"Your _hair_," She giggled. He looked in the mirror and blushed lightly. He tried to fix it with his hands, but that just made it worse. Sakura laughed again. "Here," She said before trying to fix his hair.

Sasuke was pretty sure it was cliche, but her face was seriously _right in front of him_ and she was _Sakura_. And Sasuke was a man [despite some accusation from Naruto], and she was _so, so pretty._

It didn't help that Sasuke was stupid.

Which was why, when Sakura stopped messing with his hair and let out a cry of "There!", he cut off whatever she was going to say next by kissing her.

_Chapter Five;  
_**Don't Call My Name.**

_(end)_

**AN. **All I'm saying, is OTPPPPPPPPPPPP. On another note, I secretly think Kakashi is kind of awesome. [though sasuke is my favorite.]


	6. Of Titles That Begin With 'Of'

**AN. **Remember back in chapter uno when I said updates would be kind of sporadic because I have no idea where I'm going with his and it's more or less a side project? Yeah. Haven't updated since 11-12-10.

...Have you noticed that since the first chapter I've randomly added more and more cuss words? It's because in the beginning - I was trying to control my Writer's Tourettes. Then I gave up.

* * *

I never had much luck with romance. Now, I know what you're thinking - "But you're a horribly sexy stud!". Trust me, I know - I just didn't quite have a way with words. Not to mention I always wore this mask so people weren't really sure _what_ to think.

I had this one girlfriend - Anko, she was _fucking crazy_. But, you know, she was my first girlfriend so I'm like "Hells to yes."

I mean, everything was totally cool - but then, I guess she decided I was boring or something like that, and we broke up. I wasn't all that sad.

Until I realized she stole my favorite skinny jeans.

Skinny Jean Faggots

**-What The Bloody Fuck.**

He pulled away and there was only silence. Sakura brought her hand to her mouth and touched her lips. _What the bloody fuck was that? _She looked back up at Sasuke. He was avoiding her eyes, blushing.

"Sorry," He muttered. She then realized she was trying to say...something, but only mindless blabber was coming out.

He made a move to leave.

She didn't want him to leave. She wanted to know _what the bloody fuck was that? _Well, obviously, she knew what it _was _but with Sasuke, you could never know what it _meant._

She wasn't sure why, but she moved out of the way and let him pass.

She went back to her room and laid down in the bed. The last thing she heard before she drifted off to sleep was a car driving away.

_Chapter Six;  
_**+Of Titles That Begin with 'Of'.**

**-Like Hell.**

Sakura always blamed the guitar. 'Cause, fer seriously? Guitars were _sexy_, but um...yeah, she shouldn't think things like that.

Especially when the person who owned said guitar was _Sasuke._ That was just a no-no.

Besides, he probably couldn't actually play it anyway.

Anyways - she blamed the guitar for the random thought that decided to occupy her mind that said "My damn, Uchiha Sasuke is one sexy stud muffin." [after all, he DID do it all while still being sexy.]

So yeah, she blamed the guitar [and inner Sakura - the demon] and maybe Karin too. Sure, she USED to like Sasuke, because quite frankly even without the guitar he was not something she'd mind staring at for long periods of time - but that was in the past.

She did not like her best friend.

[and this is where she would have to correct it and say "best GUY friend" to appease Karin even though he was probably - legit - _her_ best friend too.]

So, yeah, the point is that LIKE HELL she liked Sasuke.

No, she just blamed that thought on the guitar.

It was the guitar's fault anyway.

She did not LIKE Sasuke.

Besides, she could think of another four letter word that started with 'L' when it came to how she felt about Sasuke.

**-Suigetsu Skinnies.**

Once upon a time in a land far away-

No. Suigetsu didn't like fairy tales - except maybe that one where the guy looks like a pedophile near the end, but that's besides the point - and quite frankly this WASN'T a fairytale because Suigetsu Hozuki does not star in fairy tales about going to buy skinny jeans.

He went to walmart, bought some grey skinny jeans, and wore them to school the next day.

End of the MOTHER FUCKING STORY, BITCH.

**-Tutoring.**

If we're being totally legit here - Karin sucked at math. No, actually - she was so bad at it, that she _fucking_ sucked at math.

True story.

Anyways, her teachers exact words were "If you don't bring your grade up, I'll have to refer you to a remedial math class." After asking Sasuke what that meant, she decided that could _not _go to remedial classes because remedial classes didn't have Suigetsu. Or Sakura. She doubted Sasuke even knew where the classroom was.

Her teacher - Kurenai, or some shizznit like that - said that tutoring would be her best option.

So, she signed up for tutoring.

And every single one of the tutors _sucked_. [and some even slipped in a comment about how they didn't like red hair or how contacts look nicer or how yellow skinny jeans are LA-AME (discretely, of course).]

"Peoples, I need help," she announced at lunch one day. Sakura had just sat down with a nice stuffed crust pizza and Suigetsu had been their previously with a chicken sandwich, talking to Sasuke who brought a _motherfucking salad and Gatorade _from home.

"Oh, come on Karin," Suigetsu began to reply, his face stuffed with chicken. He swallowed before continuing. "You know we were only kidding all those times we said you were ugly."

"So you think I'm pretty now?"

"Depends, are you going to kill yourself?"

"No."

"Then no."

Karin narrowed her eyes at him as he continued to eat. "I need a math tutor." Sasuke looked at her.

"Don't they have a program for that?" He asked. _And seriously, he was eating it like a girl on a diet - the dressing was on the **side** and just...no._

"Yeah, but that's mostly made of snotty, stuck up bi-atches."

He shrugged, and took another bite of his _not manly_ salad. "I could tutor you."

"NO!" Suigetsu and Sakura screamed at the same time. He gave a Sakura a pointed look because she was closest and he was already kind of going blind because you know - he was an Uchiha.

"What's _that_ supposed to mean, Haruno?"

"Well, Sasu-cakes, one would normally assume that two people screaming 'no' when someone offers to do something would imply that the other two people think that the person who offered to do said something was bad at whatever they offered to do," Suigetsu answered for her. Sasuke flicked his attention over to Suigetsu.

"...Hn."

"Uh...no to Sasuke, what about you Sakura?" She shrugged.

"I dunno, math isn't really my strong point - now, if you needed help in science, it'd be a different story."

"So, there's like...no one that could tutor me?" Suigetsu coughed to get her attention. "No one at all? That's just it? I'll be moved to remedial math?" Suigetsu coughed again. "Suigetsu go to the nurse, I'm having a moment."

He rolled his eyes. "Um, no, Kar-bear, _I _can tutor you."

It would've been totally nice and thoughtful had she not burst out laughing.

"_You_ tutor _me_? Uh, no. What do you have in math anyway? A 'C'? 'D'? Or are you totally failing?"

"...I have a 94."

"Hi, Suigetsu, best friend - how would you like to tutor your good buddy Karin in math?"

**-Forehead.**

There are several things that you can't mention to Sakura, lest you want to _die_ - even if you're one of her best friends.

Of these things, it includes:

+Ino Yamanaka.  
+Sailor Moon.  
+Her hair color (you could get away with this once and only once.)  
+Prince of Tennis.  
+Sparkly red pencils.  
+Vampire books.  
+and, more importantly, her _forehead_.

As a wise man probably once said: You gotta death wish, bitch? Because if you do - you walk right on up to that lil' pink haired girl and you start some shizz about her forehead.

Actually, it was probably Naruto that said that.

Anyways, Sakura always had some..._issues_ revolving around her forehead region, because it was rather...um..._large_. She grew into it, actually, but it was still a touchy subject even though there was no longer anything to insult.

If you even began to say the word in front of her - she'd be on you like a fat kid on cake.

...I've said too much.

**-TEAM 7, GO!**

Winter break had just ended and it was back to the normal activities of everyday high school.

For example;

"LEE!"

"GAI-SENSEI!"

"LEE!"

"GAI-SENSEI!"

Obviously, reunions after two weeks of having to deal with freezing cold weather and family was enough to make you overcome with joy. In a nice little english class on the east wing of the school, reserved for freshmen and sophomores, there was another reunion.

"NARUTO!"

"SAKURA!"

"NARUTO!"

"SAKURA!"

"I feel unloved."

"SASUKE!"

"TEME!"

"...no."

And they never included Sasuke in their after-holiday cheerful-ness again. True story.

**- a k a t s u k i.**

**From: Meh Lover  
To: Sexy-Cakes**

_Dude, can I come over? I'm all depressed right now - my parents won't let me get the new Lady Gaga CD. D:_

**From: Sexy-Cakes  
To: Meh Lover**

_Um...there's kind of a gang meeting going on in my house right now. Help me.  
_

**From: Meh Lover  
To: Sexy-Cakes**

_...What?_

**From: Sexy-Cakes  
To: Meh Lover**

_HELP ME, DAMMIT - THE BLOND WANTS TO BLOW ME UP WITH HIS ART._

**From: Meh Lover  
To: Sexy-Cakes**

_Should I bring reinforcements?_

**From: Sexy-Cakes  
To: Meh Lover**

Twenty minutes later, Suigetsu showed up at Sasuke's door, followed by Sakura, who looked ready to kick someone's ass, and Karin, who looked ready to watch Sakura kick someone's ass and kick someone where the sun don't shine in her stilettos.

What they saw was... Um...

What the fuck was this?

It was basically a ton of high school kids - most of which were littered in tattoos and piercings - sitting down and having a tea party.

When they turned their head, they saw Sasuke. He was holding a cat and petting it, Godfather style. He was smiling, viciously, as a guy with long blond hair poured his brother more tea.

"Uh...," was all that came out of Suigetsu's mouth.

Sasuke looked over to them. "I took care of it."

**-All 'em Punk Ass Kids.**

Uchiha clan family reunions were rarer than a piano falling on a random innocent bystanders head. Nevertheless, with Itachi just graduating, they thought it best to bring the family together for some good, old-fashioned, Uchiha clan madness.

Sasuke did not like his family, though - save his mother and those rare moment when Itachi was a decent guy instead of a psychopathic bitch.

He was also the youngest in his family (Itachi was the same age as Shisui, so he was fine), so what would he have to do?

Nothing. Absolutely nothing. Except eat cake, but Sasuke didn't like cake.

So, he invited Karin. Don't as _why_ he invited Karin - it was mainly because Suigetsu was likely to kill somebody and Sakura was unavailable.

"Okay, so first they're going to ask you if you're my girlfriend, then - when you say 'no', they're going to continue thinking you're my girlfriend even though you're not," Sasuke explained, as he drove Karin back to his house. "Basically, just ignore them - that's what I'm doing, which is why you're here."

Karin nodded. "So, basically - it's going to be one big awkward turtle."

"Pretty much."

When they arrived at the Uchiha household - it was basically exactly as Sasuke had said. At least seven different people walked up and asked if she was Sasuke's girlfriend and then giggled quietly and winked after she said "no."

Except one of them said "So...you're a lesbian?"

"This is _weird_," she said when they were in his room. "Like - legit, why couldn't Suigetsu come?"

"Because if Suigetsu was here he would've killed Shisui and my grandmother by now."

"What about Sakura?"

"She was unavailable," he replied. She rolled her eyes.

"See Sasuke - now I feel unloved. I'm like the rebound because Sakura couldn't be here. I'm just second best," she said, dramatically, before falling onto his bed, an arm drapped over her forehead as if she was dying.

Sasuke rolled his eyes and, without realizing it, muttered "Everyone is second best to Sakura."

**-RAWR - I'm a Dinosaur :3.**

It really wasn't that often when Suigetsu and Sakura hung out by themselves. Actually - this was the first time it had happened.

And it was kind of awkward.

Normally, they were the ones who actually made conversation instead of Sasuke who would contribute just a bit, and Karin - who'd punch Suigetsu with every word. But there was literally _nothing_ to talk about.

How they got into this situation, they'd never know.

Sakura coughed, awkwardly, to fill the silence. "So..."

"So...," Suigetsu repeated. "...Um...so...what's up with Sasuke's hair, am I right?"

"...You sound like a bad stand-up comedian."

"Hey, this is an excellent time to talk about Sasuke. He's not here - so he can't hit me."

"Why do Karin and Sasuke _always_ hit you?" Sakura wondered, aloud. Really though - they always did. Or, if they didn't hit him, they at least glared.

"Because Karin thinks I'm hawt and Sasuke's a dick."

Sakura let out a violent "Ha!" Suigetsu looked at her, eyebrow raised. She cleared her throat. "I don't think girl's _hit_ guys they like."

"Uh-huh! It's like it elementary school when a guy pulls the hair of a girl he likes - except it's reversed and she's hitting me."

"Did you always pull Karin's hair?" Sakura asked with a dreamy tone.

"What's _that_ supposed to mean?" Suigetsu asked, glaring slightly.

"All I'm sayin' is that if you think Karin hits you because she's, like, in love with your body or something - chances are, you probably like her," she explained. "I can't think of any other reason you'd be _mutilating_ those signals."

"Okay - well what do _you_ think it means?"

"Probably that she wants you to stop being a _dick _to her all the time, Lover Boy."

"...Oh."

**=Play Me Another Sad Song.**

Sasuke didn't want to go home. Sasuke didn't want to go anywhere. He just wanted to keep driving until he was so incredibly _lost_ that all he could think about was finding his way back to Konoha before his mother - bless her soul - started to worry.

So, he stopped thinking and kept driving. Eventually, he was led to Karin's house. Suigetsu's car was parked outside. He didn't know if that made it better or worse.

He got out of the car, and walked - looking down at his feet. He got to the door, never raising his head. He stared at the doorbell as he waited for somebody to answer the door.

Karin opened the door eventually, and Sasuke just kept staring at the doorbell.

"Sasu...ke?" she asked, worried.

"Karin," he said, his deep voice cracking just a bit.

"What's wrong?"

"I didn't want to go home."

"Where were you?"

"Sakura's house."

Her breath hitched. She didn't know what could've happened but Sasuke looked _lost_ so it couldn't have been anything good. She led him inside. Books were scattered over the floor from where she just studying with Suigetsu. Said teen was currently sitting on her couch, staring at the television. Hearing her approach, he looked over.

"We have a problem," was all Karin said and Suigetsu understood.

It was going to be a long night.

_Chapter Six;  
_**Of Titles That Begin With 'Of'**

_(end)_

**AN. **And that, children, is why you shouldn't do drugs.


	7. Mothertruckers

**AN. **I've been sick. It's icky.

This chapter is written a biiiiit different, but it should be back to normal by the next chapter.(:

I'm horrible at writing people working out problems - I, personally, ignore problems I have. I'm sure they'll be back, though. D:

* * *

I was gonna clean my room, but then I got high.

Or at least, I wish I got high so I'd have a good excuse.

I hope my mother doesn't kill me.

Skinny Jean Faggots

_Chapter Seven;  
_**+Mothertruckers.**

**-Baby, It's Cold Outside.**

Sakura, quite frankly, _despised_ the cold. If it was a person - she'd stab it. Repeatedly. Even after it died.

So, that really didn't explain why she was  
one; _awake_ at 1AM  
and two; taking a nice, friendly stroll in 20 degree weather at 1AM.

Okay, so, maybe it wasn't weird that she was awake this late, because it was a weekend and she was a teenager, but still - she was outside of her nice, comfortable home. It didn't take a _genius_ to figure out where she was going - Karin's house, obviously. Where else would a girl go at 1AM on a weekend?

That's not to say every girl went to Karin's house every weekend at 1AM, but they would go to their best friends house if they had reason. It's not like she was going to walk all the way to...Naruto's house or something.

Not that Naruto wasn't cool and all, but she needed girl talk. And like her parents would approve of her going to a _boy's _house this late. And, knowing Naruto, he definitely _wasn't_ awake.

When she reached her house, she rang the doorbell - three times. No fucking way was Karin going to not answer.

After thirty seconds, she got tired of waiting, so she rang it another three times.

Still nothing.

"_KARIN!_" she yelled, ringing the doorbell over and over and not stopping until Karin finally did open the door. The redhead stared at her and rolled her eyes.

She then shushed her and motioned for her to come inside.

Once the door was closed though, she slapped her. Right across the face.

"_What_ was that for?" Sakura asked, rubbing her cheek, trying to get rid of the most-definitely-there red hand print.

"You know _damn_ well what that was for," Karin whisper-yelled in reply. Sakura's eyes widened slightly. She was so stupid... Of course Sasuke would've already gone to Karin's. "Do you know what the fuck you did?" she asked.

It didn't matter what she did - she didn't like it.

If Sakura was still twelve, she would've cried. Right now, all she could do was calm down. She was breathing deeply.

Karin sighed, "_What happened_?" she hissed.

"I...don't know."

"How do you not know?"

Sakura pulled at her hair and sighed. "I _don't_ know, it just happened!" she yelled, making Karin shush her again. Karin took a deep breath.

"He kissed you - that's what happened," the redhead explained. "And what did you do?"

"Nothing."

"Why?"

"Because I didn't know what to do."

Karin looked down and shook her head. She face-palmed and then she smiled. Eventually, she started laughing. "Really, Sakura?" she asked, looking up, a smile bright on her face, but her eyes wild. "God, you are so _stupid_ sometimes."

Sakura glared at her. "You've never been in a situation where you didn't know what the fuck you were supposed to do so you just did... nothing? I was shocked, I wasn't thinking, okay?" Dear God, she could feel the tears. "We were making sure everything with Naruto and Hinata was going okay, because I swear to God if he messed that up I will stab him, then we went to my house 'cause we were in bushes and their were leaves everywhere," now she was crying. Why, cruel fates? "And t-then he kissed me," she began furiously wiping away tears while she spoke. "And I didn't know what to do, so I didn't do anything."

She was _sobbing_ now.

Before she could even register anything other than _why am I crying?_, Karin was hugging her, telling her that it was going to be okay, because it's not like what happened couldn't be fixed with a few choice words. [she didn't mention that the wrong words could make it much worse.]

Eventually, her words caught up with the pinkette and the tears stopped coming. It was another few seconds before she could stop the sobs, though.

She smiled, weakly. "He probably hates me," she said, bitterly.

"I don't think that idiot could ever hate you."

"Or could he?" a deep voice came from the foot of the stairs. Sakura and Karin both jumped and whipped around to see Suigetsu.

"Um...why are you here?" Sakura asked, slightly afraid.

"Oh, I fell asleep when we were trying to make Sasuke stop being a bitch. Whenever something goes wrong, he lists every single thing in his life that has ever went wrong - it got tiring." Karin nodded her confirmation, but then realized something about what he had said.

"Wait, what do you mean that Sasuke could hate Sakura, idiot?"

"What? Oh, I just needed something epic to say as an entrance. Yeah, that little hoe could never hate her. I don't think he's really _capable_ of hating someone, as weird as it sounds..."

"What did he say exactly?"

"Oh, well it started out with the story of what happened," Suigetsu explained.

"He talks _a lot_ when he has something to bitch about," Karin chipped in.

Suigetsu nodded and continued. "Then he moved on to his daddy issues - I seriously didn't think anyone could say 'I don't think he ever loved me' in so many words, I thought he'd never shut up - then he went on to talk about his issues with Itachi - like how even though Itachi was never horrible to him like his father, he has man periods that stem from having long, girly hair that make him a bitch - then we got to hear about Ino and Naruto sitting near him in every class ever because of his last name, and he _really_ had some issues with an old science teacher."

"...Can you remind me why we never zone out when listening to Sasuke's problems?" Karin asked him.

"Because I'm _important_," the Uchiha said from behind Suigetsu.

Sakura blinked, completely forgetting everything that had just happened. Suigetsu's appearance could lighten any situation - he just didn't take anything seriously, he went through life just generally not giving a shit. It was his motto - "go through life without giving a shit" [he was trying to find a way to make it rhyme, but he was kind of lazy].

"...And why are you here?"

"I'm pretty sure Karin knocked me out...," he said, thoughtfully.

Suigetsu grinned. "If I didn't fall asleep - I'd pro'ly knock ya' out, too."

Sasuke shifted his eyes over to him. "Enlighten me, Hozuki, what is _that_ supposed to mean?"

"Dude - no one wants to hear about how daddy doesn't love you."

"I had to make him shut up when he started talking about his crazy uncle. It was funny at first, but just..." she shivered in fear.

Suigetsu raised an eyebrow. Sasuke explained, "When I was five, Madman Madara force fed me cake." His eyes darkened. "I _hate_ cake."

They were all quiet. "That's nice, Sasuke," Sakura said.

"_Karin_!" came the redhead's father from upstairs. They all stopped. "You all need to either _shut up_ or _get the fuck out of my house_!" They all looked at her.

"...He gets angry when he's woken up," she whispered.

Suigetsu rolled his eyes. He really never liked her dad. He was a creep. "Well, we still have some serious shit - that people seem to be ignoring - to talk about, so we should probably go to Sasuke's house."

Sasuke raised an eyebrow. "We're just going to walk over to my house at one-something in the morning? What about _rapists_?"

"I will never understand you."

"Suck it up, Sauce-y," Sakura said in a harsh whisper. "I walked all the way over here _by myself_. I think you can handle the risk of a broken nail at coming in contact with your old science teacher."

"_Don't_ mention him, Sakura. Damn."

"Please don't," Karin said. "I really don't need to hear that story again."

"_I said get out!_"

Karin rolled her eyes, grabbed her keys, and led them outside.

**-It's Still Cold Out Here.**

"WAIT!" Karin yelled once she closed the door. "I have to get a jacket." She ran back inside, returning with two jackets. She threw Suigetsu's at him and put the other one on herself.

"...Isn't that _mine_?" Sasuke asked her, he had been wearing a different jacket because he thought he had lost that one. She looked down at the jacket and then up to the sky, thoughtfully.

"Now that you mention it...," she said. "I'm pretty sure you let me borrow this last week. I forgot to give it back to you..." Suigetsu laughed.

"Wow, it fucking fits you like it's yours," he explained. "Obviously, Sasuke is a little girl in disguise."

"Or Karin is manly."

"...No, I'm pretty sure you just have girly shoulders." Sasuke glared and they continued to walk in a comfortable silence.

Nobody said anything all the way to his house, though Karin and Suigetsu did have some kind of silent argument and began hitting each other when they got to his porch.

Sasuke rolled his eyes, grabbed his key, and opened the door, saying nothing but giving them a look that said "If you don't shut the fuck up - my parents will find a way to castrate you." Once inside, he took off his jacket - because the Uchiha's could afford proper heating -, threw it somewhere, and then flipped on the light in the living room.

He then turned to stare at them all.

"We might die," he said in a normal tone, with an added shrug.

"Nah," Karin said, waving it off. "Your parents love us." He rolled his eyes.

"But they _don't_ like being woken up at one in the morning." Vaguely, he wondered if they should be whispering - just in case.

"It's a risk we'll have to take," Suigetsu announced before sitting on the floor. Sakura sat down next to him, followed by Karin. Sasuke wondered why they weren't sitting on the couch, but didn't question it and sat down, too, so they formed a circle.

"Somehow, this reminds me of the time me and Naruto broke into your house to eat pizza," Sakura said to Sasuke.

"Ooh, story time~!" Suigetsu said, excitedly.

**-Pranking.**

"Psst, Sakura!" Naruto whisper-yelled to get her attention. Which, was kind of pointless really because they were in a secluded part of the library that might as well have been specifically there for talking.

"What, Naruto?" she whispered back - if he knew he could talk loudly, he'd talk _too_ loudly.

"You wanna do something awesome later?"

"...For the last time, Naruto - I don't like you. Ask out someone else, like...Ino or...Hinata?" she wiggled her eyebrows, suggestively like YES, TAKE OUT HINATA, YOU FOOL.

In response, she just got a confused look. "Um...I wasn't asking you out - but, you know, if you ever change you mind...," he let himself trail off. "Anyways, I found out where Sasuke keeps the spare key to his house."

"...Are you suggesting we break into Sasuke's house?"

"We could like...order pizza. And then he'll come home and he'll smell pizza but he'll have no idea _why_, and we would've eaten it all so it'd just be gone."

Sakura stared at him through green eyes. _Why_ did she associate with idiots? "...And where would we get the money to pay for the pizza?" She really didn't know if she was considering it or if she was trying to outsmart him.

"My mom owes me some money 'cause we bet on who would win American Idol last season and she's still in denial about losing. We just need a clip of where he won and there's nothing she can say to not give me the money."

"I've met your mom, Naruto. She'll deny making the bet." He then proceeded to take out his phone and show her a voice recording of where him and his mom officiated the bet.

"We also have papers - Uzumaki's take their betting very seriously."

They ordered the pizza right when school let out and then went to Naruto's house to get the money - they knew for a fact that Sasuke had a violin thing he had to go to right after school, and it would last for about two hours.

After a bit of arguing with Kushina, they got the money and ran to Sasuke's house. True to his word, Naruto did, in fact, know where the key was. They made it just in time because the delivery man arrived moments later. They paid and took the pizza, thanking him quickly.

"No plates," Sakura said because Naruto was an idiot and would undoubtedly decide he wanted a plate. "They'll notice - they can't think someone broke into their house."

Naruto nodded and took a seat on the floor. It was a ritual - they could not eat pizza at a table. They had to sit down on the floor.

When they were only four slices in, Sasuke returned home.

His parents ignored them because they knew that Sasuke liked to associate himself with horribly weird people. Sasuke, however, just stared at them. They were both sitting there, frozen - Naruto in the middle of eating, and Sakura in the middle of going for another slice.

Sasuke had to wonder why he associated with idiots.

**-Sasuke Has a Warm House.**

"Why have we never heard this story?" Karin asked, glaring as Sakura finished her story. They were supposed to know everything.

Sakura shrugged and replied, "It was just a few days ago."

"...God, are we _all_ ADD?" Suigetsu asked.

"What do you mean?" Karin replied.

"...Like, we have some serious shit to talk about about and we're just...not."

"Nobody likes to talks about serious shit, Suigetsu," Sasuke said.

Sakura nodded in agreement. "And we're all so awkwardly hyper-active we're even less willing too."

Karin crossed her arms and glared. "Quite frankly," she said. "This serious shit doesn't really involve me - it involves _you two_," she motioned toward Sasuke and Sakura. "And quite frankly, if it's not my problem - I don't care about talking about it."

Sasuke stood up dramatically. "I DON'T KNOW HOW TO DEAL WITH THIS!" he yelled. Suigetsu through himself backwards out of fear.

"_Sit the fuck down, Sasuke_," Karin said, angrily. "Being a retard isn't going to save you." He sat down, dejectedly.

Suigetsu, who was now sitting normally again, said, "...How can you go from not shutting up about your problems to deciding not to talk about them."

"He doesn't work things out," Sakura explained. "He just bitches."

Sasuke looked at her. "Love you too, Sakura," he said, sarcastically. She smiled and made a heart with her hands. He rolled his eyes, in turn.

"Of course," Karin was talking to Suigetsu, but she made it loud so Sasuke and Sakura would know to listen. "I hate people who ignore their problems more." Nobody said anything. She looked over to Sasuke and Sakura and smirked. "You two feel free to make out at any time."

"...Okay."

_Chapter Seven;  
_**Mothertruckers.**

* * *

**AN.** I am never writing a romance novel. Just sayin'.

I hate this chapter.


	8. Here Lies Squidward's Hopes and Dreams

**AN.**asdfjkl; i need to try harder. I've been very _angst_ focused lately, though... You can't write humor like that. D:

* * *

I don't know why I decided to become a teacher.

It's not like I enjoy being around kids [well, technically - they're teenagers]. I'm always late. I enjoy reading "adult literature". I never really payed attention in school, so it's not like I have the general knowledge [of course, if you're late - no one really notices].

In all honesty, there was no real reason for me to become a teacher.

All I know is that when I sat down to take the SAT and it asked what I was planning on doing with my life - I bubbled in "teacher". That's what I went to college for. That's what I'm doing with my life now.

So, honestly? Who knows where life will take you - and who knows why it takes you there?

Skinny Jean Faggots.

**-Carpet Burn.**

By now, Karin and Suigetsu were sleeping on the floor in the Uchiha living room. Sakura kept almost falling asleep and then with a random violent jerk of her head, she'd be awake again. Sasuke was still wide awake - even though it was half past two in the morning. Once he was awake - it was nearly impossible for him to fall back asleep until the next night - no matter how tired he is.

So, Sasuke and Sakura were the only ones still awake - Sakura only halfway.

Finally, with one last jerk - Sakura fell asleep anyways, her head landing on top of Sasuke's chest.

He looked down at her, blankly, and then proceeded to wrap and arm around her so she'd stay pressed against him.

Then he tried to fall asleep.

_Chapter Eight;  
_**+Here Lies Squidward's Hopes And Dreams**

**-Shuffle-rin.**

It was the day he allowed her to plug in her ipod to his car that he will regret forever. Suigetsu didn't know Karin had bipolar music taste.

He was perfectly fine with the All Time Low and Boys Like Girls that played first. He had hung out with Sasuke enough to be okay with The Word Alive and Attack! Attack! that followed afterwards. He fucking loved Lady Gaga.

But no. _No._ This was where he drew the line. THE LINE, GOOD SIRS, THE LINE!

"Karin," he said, blankly. She looked over at him, boredly. "I am going to turn this car around. We are going to go back to your house. And we are going to delete _every ounce of Kesha from your ipod._"

**-Constant Annoyance.**

When it all came down to it - Sasuke liked silence. He didn't mind noise if it was music [_his_music, anyways - none of Suigetsu's silly Lady Gaga] or him yelling at someone [because he liked the sound of himself causing tears].

What he did _not_like was Suigetsu's brother stumbling into the house he was currently staying at in the middle of the night, drunk, and _waking him up_. Sasuke was a very light sleeper and once he woke up - he was _awake_. Suigetsu could sleep through anything, he couldn't.

He definitely couldn't sleep through the rattling of pots and pans that was coming from some drunk college student that was visiting for a few days while school was out.

While he couldn't just go downstairs and punch out someones eldest son [unless, of course, it was Itachi], he could punch Suigetsu.

So he'd do that.

And for now - he'd just text Karin and wake her up.

**-Jashin.**

Itachi's friends were horrible. Horribly horrible. So horrible - that if horrible was some kind of food, you'd have to use up all the horrible in the world to make it.

They were just... they were horrible.

HORRIBLE.

It was a real shame neither Karin nor Sakura _nor _Suigetsu knew this before agreeing to meet at Sasuke's house.

So, without knowing what horrors awaited them at the Uchiha house (besides Sasuke's mother because it had been proven in the past that if you did _anything_ to mess with _her_ baby - you were dead, no excuses), they blindly made their way up the stairs (in a group because they _could_) that lead to the porch.

They then rang the doorbell and stood, waiting for it to open like the good children they weren't.

The next part of the story is far too frightening to explain.

Let's just say... Itachi's friends are horrible.

**-Post-it.**

Karin fucking loved post-it notes.

She used to make little poorly drawn flip books (because, when it came down to it, Karin was rather artistically-challenged) after jacking Sakura's (_lime_) green sharpie.

She liked to flip through them (whether they had a drawing on them or not - she had stopped after Suigetsu [the bastard] insulted her oval-headed stick figures), just to feel the little tiny gust of wind it made on her palm.

Then it gave her a paper cut and she took some scissors and cut them all into a hundred pieces and through the bits into a fire.

Fuckin' post-it notes.

**-Ring Around the Rosie, Pocket Full of Posies - Ashes, Ashes, We All Fall Down!**

Why did she keep humming that, Sasuke wondered, annoyed.

He was sitting next to Sakura and she wouldn't. Stop. Humming. It was always "Ring Around the Rosie", too. Never anything else. Never any variety.

So, he did the only sensible thing to do -

"You know that song's about people dying, right?"

- She never hummed it again.

**-LOL THAT SOUNDS SMEXUAL.**

"...What are we doing?" Sasuke asked, looking around the empty parking lot he had just been dragged to.

"You, Sasuke, are going to be my wingman," Suigetsu announced. The dark-haired male raised an eyebrow. That didn't explain why they were in an empty parking lot at all. What the hell.

"...And?"

"And Karin and Sakura are coming to meet us right now. You need to isolate Sakura."

"...Why?"

"So I can hit on Karin."

"..._Why_?"

"...Because I like her?"

"But... You're her uncle."

Suigetsu opened his mouth the reply about how _Sasuke was not technically Karin's father and what the hell?_Before he could say anything, however - Karin and Sakura showed up. Sakura looked confused as to why they were in an empty parking lot and why exactly Sasuke looked more emo that usual. Karin just looked annoyed.

"Suigetsu!" she yelled, angrily. "Why the hell are we here?"

Again, Suigetsu opened his mouth the respond. This time, however, he was cut off by Sasuke.

"Karin!" he half-yelled in the way only Sasuke could really manage. "We have to get out of here - Uncle Suigetsu has gone insane! D:"

And with that, he grabbed both Karin and Sakura's (because like hell he'd leave his wifey with a madman) arms and dragged them away from the parking lot.

Suigetsu walked home, alone, dejected, and rejected.

**-Curiosity Killed The Cat.**

"...Sasuke. Suigetsu. What the hell are you doing?" a thirteen-year old Sakura asked, taking in the scene in front of her. Sasuke was holding a cat and petting it with a bored expression, while Suigetsu was holding another two, but he looked more like he was trying to shield them with his own body.

"Sakura!" Suigetsu said, glad she was here. "Curiosity has been killing cats! We have to protect them!"

Sasuke nodded, squeezing the pure-white cat he was holding to his chest and darting his eyes around, suspiciously.

Sakura was about to say something, but decided against it.

She instead took a picture of Sasuke holding said cat, and then simply walked away.

What the hell?

**-Height.**

Sasuke is short.

**-Journey.**

"_Just a small town girl, living in a lonely world. She took the midnight train going anywhere._" It was the first day of summer vacation.

As always, they were at Sakura's house playing Guitar Hero.

Sasuke was on guitar, Karin was on base, Sakura was on drums, and Suigetsu was singing.

It was kind of hilarious.

"_Just a city boy, born and raised in South Detroit. He took the midnight train going anywhere... A singer in a smoking room. They smell of wine and cheap purfume. For a smile they can share the night it goes on and on and on and on._"

Suigetsu was not trying. At all. He was more or less just saying words.

Eventually, he actually stopped saying words. He was just making noises that vaguely sounded like "Strangers dancing up and down the boulevard."

...They lost that song.

It was Suigetsu, though. Sakura actually quite sucked at drums.

**-Bad Bromance.**

"Hey Sasuke," Sakura asked, making conversation. He looked over at her as a way of saying "continue". "Have you ever made out with a guy?"

"..."

"Is that a yes?"

"..."

"A no?"

"..."

"It was Naruto, wasn't it?"

"..."

"Or _was_ that a no?"

"..."

"Sasuke?"

**-If We Bring This Up Enough, It Will Still Be Funny.**

"Hey Sasuke," Suigetsu said, poking the boy.

"What?"

"I just thought I should let you know... Don't be a drag, just be a queen."

Sasuke looked him straight in the eye. "Suigetsu - I can seriously make you hate Lady Gaga right now."

"I doubt it."

And with that, Sasuke looked Suigetsu straight in the eye. His facial expression was completely serious and he didn't blink. "_Walk, walk, fashion baby, work it move that bitch crazy, walk, walk, fashion baby, work it move that bitch crazy, walk, walk, fashion baby, work it move that bitch crazy, walk, walk, passion baby, work it I'm a free bitch, baby._

"_I want your love and I want your revenge, I want your love, I don't want to be friends._

"_Je veux ton amour. __Et je veux ta revanche. __Je veux ton amour._" Then Sasuke turned away, leaving it at that.

.

.

"A-and he was speaking French!" Suigetsu cried into Karin shoulder. The experience had traumatized him so.

But seriously. Sasuke speaking French.

It's very traumatizing.

**-Dinosaurs Go Rawr.**

"I swear to God that guitar is possessed," Suigetsu said. Sasuke had gotten the previously broken string fixed and it was now sitting back in his room.

The dark-haired male rolled his eyes. "No," he said, dryly. "They performed an exorcism when I got the string fixed."

"But what if another demon got in?"

"...Suigetsu, I _highly doubt_ -" The same string broke again, cutting him off.

"SATAN!"

**-Uke is Short For Ukulele.(:**

"...Is that thing possessed?"

"...No, Suigetsu - that's a ukulele."

"The name certainly sounds possessed."

"...It's a _ukulele._"

"Why do you have a ukulele, Sasuke?"

"Because I'm more culturally refined than you are."

"I swear it's possessed."

"Why do you think every stringed instrument I own is possessed?"

"Because what if they are?"

"What if they _aren't_?"

"Ah. Touche."

What the hell.

**That Crazy Awesome Adventure To The Ice Cream Shop.**

"I want ice cream," Karin announced. They were sitting on the porch to her house, not doing anything in particular. It was a hot day.

"I do, too," Suigetsu agreed.

"Me three," Sakura said. They all looked at Sasuke.

"I don't like ice cream," he replied in monotone.

"Cannibal!" Sakura yelled.

"...That doesn't make sense," he told her.

She shrugged. "Whatever - I want ice cream," she restated.

"Then go get some ice cream? It's not like there isn't an ice cream parlor right across the street from the neighborhood.

"You think you can get out of his Uchiha?" Karin asked. "No way - _you're_ buying."

"...No."

"_Yes_."

"_No_."

"I just want some ice cream," Suigetsu interrupted. Sakura nodded and grabbed Sasuke by the arm, pulling him up from his seat. Suigetsu and Karin followed her example by standing up themselves.

They began the long journey to get ice cream. While, yes, there was an ice cream parlor right across the street from the neighborhood - Karin lived rather far away from said entrance of the neighborhood.

When they finally made it to entrance, they were greeted with traffic.

Suigetsu pushed the button that said "PUSH IF CROSSING" and, while they waited for the walking-person to turn green, Karin said, "Okay, so - just so we're clear, Sasuke is buying, right?"

"No."

"Yes."

"_No_."

"_Yes_."

"I think Sasuke should buy," Sakura contributed.

"Why do I have to buy if I'm not even getting any?"

"Because by not getting any, you're ruining our fun."

They ended up forcing him to agree.

Eventually, the walking-man-person turned green and they were allowed to cross the street. They walked across quickly because the time was depleting and they could get run over! SAFETY FIRST!

They ordered their ice cream, Sasuke paid, and everyone lived happily ever after sort of.

**=Maybe.**

Nope. He couldn't sleep.

Sasuke let out a sigh and looked around his darkened living room.

He was so tired, yet he couldn't sleep. His head dropped onto Sakura's. It wasn't hard, it looked more like he was comforting her or something of the sort.

So... tired...

And what the hell was that noise?

It was like a tapping at the window or something.

He sighed again. He was never going to fall asleep, was he?

He yawned and then felt the very distinct feeling of Sakura punching him in the gut.

"_Stop making noise_," she whispered.

"_I can't sleep, deal with it_," he whispered back, tired.

She groaned and wrapped and arm around his waist. "_Try harder,_" she said.

He was asleep soon enough.

_Chapter Eight;  
_**Here Lies Squidward's Hopes And Dreams.**

_(end)_

**AN.** Sometimes I think I might be a troll because I have a tendency to waste a lot of words on them going to get ice cream. It's like "Okay... I don't really give a shit, but thanks anyways."(:

Review please, (unless you have something bad to say because then I might cry. No. Seriously.)


	9. Get It, Darling

**AN.** I really love Sasuke's hair. I was watching a video of the dance I'm doing in a skit and I was in full cosplay and I was like "Wow. That's a pretty beastly wig right there."

I'M SORRY THIS IS SO LATE!

* * *

I got my band tee on,  
I got my skinny jeans on,  
And I'm ready to roll,  
Let's hit up the show.

Skinny Jean Faggots

**-This Is How We Do.**

Karin awoke to a rather interesting sight.

After all, it wasn't everyday that you saw Sasuke Uchiha _cuddling_ with Sakura Haruno.

Suigetsu was asleep on the floor next to her, mumbling in his sleep, "_Oh, yeah, right there. No, no, **harder**, Ka -_" she woke him up violently. Before he could let out a scream, she put a hand in front of his mouth.

"Give me your phone," she ordered. His hand fumbled around his back pocket, looking for his phone. When he finally found it, he passed it over to the redhead.

She put it on camera, pointed it toward Sasuke and Sakura, and took a picture.

It was going to be a good day.

_Chapter Nine;  
_**+Get It, Darling.  
**

**-Walmart.**

"Fuck, I'm bored," the white haired male said blandly, staring at the ceiling. The only other person there was Karin and like hell she was going to entertain him.

"Sugietsu, shut up. Find something to do if you're so bored."

"Well, I was going to try and extract the demon from Sasuke's guitar but he has some kind of personal problem he needs to attend to. And you know what happens when you ask Sasuke about his personal problems..."

"Yeah, yeah, he lists everything wrong in his life. Whatever. Why don't you just go home or something? Then you can stop bothering me and find something to do. It's a win-win situation, really."

He shot her a glare. "Hey, I know!" he announced, suddenly. "Let's go try to kicked out of Walmart!"

"Why would I possibly want to do that?" she asked.

"Because it would be awesome!"

"...Will you go home afterwards?"

"No, probably not."

"Then what _possible_ reason would there be to go-"

"Jeggings."

"...What?"

"Jeggings. You could get some jeggings. They're like comfortable skinny jeans. I own a pair."

She cocked an eyebrow. "You... do realize that jeggings are only for girls, right?"

"But you should see what they do to my d-"

"I DON'T WANT TO KNOW!" He smirked.

"So, we can go to Walmart?"

"Fine. Whatever."

"Yay!"

"Never do that again."

He grinned and grabbed her hand, pulling her from her seat. They were going to Walmart!

There might as well have been a Walmart around every corner, so they walked to the one that was next to the Bruster's right out of side Karin's neighborhood.

"So, why exactly did you want to go to Walmart?" Karin asked while they waited to be able to cross the street.

"To try and get kicked out."

"WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME THAT, IDIOT?" she yelled, punching him. That certainly got some interesting stares from the people passing in cars...

He put a hand over his cheek, hoping it would miraculously end the _pain_. "You didn't _askkkk_."

The little walking-person turned green and the cars stopped. They began walking across the street. "Why exactly do you want to try and get kicked out of Walmart?" she asked.

"Because I'm bored and have nothing to do."

"...So what exactly are you going to do?"

He shrugged. "I suppose we'll find out..."

"I hate you."

"Sasuke hates you." she glared at him.

They finally made it into Walmart only to have a Walmart-Cop stare at them. They looked like hooligans in tight pants. She would be watching them.

The two were just kind of standing there, having a staring contest with a Walmart-Cop when the sliding doors behind them opened. Karin took a glance back.

"...Oh. Hi... Mr. Uchiha." Fugaku nodded and grunted in response before walking toward the pet stuff. Karin blinked and turned back to Suigetsu who was still staring at the Walmart-Cop. "That was weird..."

She then grabbed Suigetsu's arm and pulled him away from where he was standing, staring at the Walmart-Cop.

He turned around and her grasp slipped from his forearm to his hand. He allowed himself to be pulled along by her.

"So, where are we going?" he asked.

"I don't know? Candy?"

"Okay then. I like candy."

.

When they got to the candy, Suigetsu picked up a mixed bag. He looked around, sat down on the floor and opened it.

"You have money to pay for that, right?"

"...Surprisingly."

He took a mini-Hershey's out and threw it at Karin.

"The fuck?"

Somebody else walked by the aisle. He threw a piece of candy at them.

"This is boring," Suigetsu said. "Barely anyone is here." He stood up, leaving the bag of candy on the floor. "Want to cart race?"

She shrugged. "Whatever."

The Walmart-Cop stopped them and made them leave for the candy thing before they could even get the carts.

**-How Porn Is Made.**

The video begins as a black screen with white letters. It says "THIS IS A VIDEO ABOUT DRUGS. DON'T DO THEM. THANKS." The screen fades to white. The camera pans out to show Suigetsu lying, asleep on the bed.

He wakes up and sit up, slowly. He grabs his head and looks around. "Why... where am I? How did I get here? I don't remember for I do crack."

"YOOOOOOOOOOOOUUUUUU," comes Karin's voice from nowhere, pulling a Soulja Boy. She jumped into the screen. "Need to get clean!"

"I need to take a shower? Rude." She glared.

"No, you need to stop doing drugs!"

"Why?"

"Because they're bad!"

"How?"

"Because you get addicted and then they murder your brain and you die." In red letters at the bottom of the screen, the words "IT'S A FACT" flashed three times before disappearing.

"I think my dealer would tell me that."

"..._Why you so stuuupid_?"

The scene faded and it went to another. It showed Suigetsu walking down the street toward a corner that Sasuke was standing at the end of.

"We need to find a better place," Sasuke said, looking around. He was a really fucking good actor. What the hell. "They think I'm doing something else other than dealing drugs... And then they think I'm dealing drugs."

"But you are dealing drugs."

"Not to the _cops_, dumb-censored-."

"Hey! Let's list types of drugs!"

"...Okay." As he spoke, the list appeared on the screen. "There's marijuana, cocaine, xanax, adderall, ecstasy, heroin, LSD, and a lot of other stuff that I can't think of." he tilts his head and gives a disturbing smile.

The scene changes again to the three sitting side-by-side on Karin's blue couch.

"My name is Suigetsu Hozuki," Suigetsu said in a way that just screamed 'I'm-reading-off-of-something'. "I do not do drugs but I know people who have in the past. One of them died. Probably."

"My name is Karin," she said, bored. It was also obvious she was reading off of something. "My friend did drugs and then they were sent to the hospital and I was sad."

"My name is Sasuke," he said, looking up at the ceiling and messing with his hair as he spoke. "My brother did drugs and now he can't do anything and has become a vegetable."

They then all said in unison, "Don't do drugs. You'll die."

Karin added, "And it will make me sad."

The scene faded and went back to Karin and Suigetsu. "But how do I go about getting 'clean'?"

"Just ask Sasuke Uchiha."

"Okay. He's sexy."

Sasuke walked onto the screen, holding a cup of water. He then proceeded to throw it in Suigetsu's face, screaming "GO TO REHAB."

The scene faded to a black screen and in white letters in said "AND THAT IS WHY YOU SHOULD NOT DO DRUGS. (:"

.

.

They made an A+ - because he's Sasuke - and they also received a detention because apparently they were "glorifying drugs" or something like that... (possibly also because he's Sasuke so people assume that all drug dealers are sexy. They aren't.)

**-Colorful Pens. **

"I WIN, BITCH, I WIN!" Sakura yelled when she ran into Karin's house.

"You are so fucking lucky my parents aren't home..."

"I wouldn't care if they were - BECAUSE I WIN!"

"And how is that?"

"First, I had a lime green sharpie and then you had colorful paper and obviously, that beats a lime green sharpie. But now I have an ace."

Karin raised an eyebrow. How the hell do you beat colorful paper? "Really now?" Sakura nodded. "And what is it that you have?" Sakura paused for a minute and dug through her purse.

When she pulled it out, Karin gasped. "COLORFUL PENS, HOE."

"Okay. Fine. You win. For now."

Sakura smirked. "Damn straight."

**-Cat.**

"Sasuke, why do you only own evil things?"

"...Hn?"

"Don't give me that shit. You have possessed instruments and now that CAT."

"...What about my cat?" Suigetsu scoffed.

"It's evil!"

"How, idiot?"

"It just scratched me!"

"She just doesn't like you."

"Oh, so it's a she now?" Sasuke blinked. "You love that cat more than me, don't you?"

"Yeah."

"Fuck you." And then he left.

**-What The Hayeck?**

"...Hey, Sak?" Sasuke said, his voice filled with curiosity.

"Yeah?"

"What's your bra size?"

The pinkette's eyes widened and she snapped her eyes over to the Uchiha. "What the hell kind of question is that?"

"'Cause it's like... too big for a B, but too small for a C, and it's like 'what the fuck?'"

"How long do you spend staring at my chest to figure that out?"

"It's a nice pastime."

She sputtered out nonsense and blushed.

"Seriously though, what is it?"

She hit the back of his head. "I'm not telling you that!"

He shrugged. "Well then."

**=Slight Plot.**

Sasuke was woken up by a small flash. He groaned.

"I don't know what you're doing, but stop. Right now."

He moved a little to try and fall back asleep but woke up immediately when he felt _hair_ on his face. He looked down and saw _pink_.

"...It's times like these when I'm glad Itachi moved out." He heard Karin laugh and looked up at her and glared.

"All of you need to _shut the fuck up_," Sakura grumbled.

"Wake up, Haruno," Suigetsu said. "The day is young!"

"You mean it's fucking early in the morning? Yeah. Let me sle_eeeeeeeeee_p."

"I can't move until you do," Sasuke said. That woke her up. Because what the fuck was he talking about.

She turned her head until she saw his face. Their faces were only inches apart. "Oh. Hi."

"SO, DID HE ASK YOU OUT IN DREAMLAND AND NOW EVERYTHING IS AWESOME AND PEACHY BECAUSE YOU SAID YES AND NOW YOU'RE DATING?" Karin yelled.

"My mom is going to kill you," Sasuke muttered.

"WHO'S DATING?"

"Oh, look. There she is," Sakura said to him. They still hadn't moved. Mikoto Uchiha was downstairs in five seconds flat. Nobody said anything. She looked over at Sasuke and Sakura (who, as previously mentioned, WERE STILL CUDDLING) and _squealed_.

She ran over and pulled Sasuke out from under Sakura like a table cloth. The teenager fell directly onto the floor.

"Ow."

Mikoto spun her son around in a type of ballroom dance. "Oh, I always knew you had it in you, so unlike your brother!" She continued on in her ramblings.

"We're not - Mother, we're not - WE'RE NOT DATING, KAA-SAN." She stopped. And glared.

"Sasuke. You know I don't like yelling at you."

"OH, YOU SHOULD FORCE HIM TO ASK HER OUT!" Karin yelled.

"Sweetie, you need quiet down. And Sasuke, ASK HER OUT THIS INSTANT!"

Sasuke looked at her with wide black eyes. What the fuck was going on? He stood there staring at her.

"I like how they look exactly like each other and they're just sitting there having a staring contest," Suigetsu whispered to Karin. "It's entertaining."

"_Naaaaaaaaaow,_" his mother whined.

Sasuke sighed and sat down on his knees next to Sakura. "She's insane," he whispered.

"I've noticed." she whispered back. They continued to conversation whispering.

"So, wanna go out?"

"Are you just saying that because she made you?"

"No."

"Oh. Okay then."

"...Is that a yes?"

"Yeah."

"Sweet."

Mikoto was looking at him, patiently. "She said yes. Please don't hurt me."

Mikoto smiled brightly. "It's okay! I have to call Itachi!"

Sasuke groaned. Karin applauded.

_Chapter nine;  
_**Get It, Darling**

_(end)_**  
**

**AN.** This chapter is shorter than the others... BUT THEY FINALLY GOT TOGETHER. :D With help from his mother. How lovely.


	10. Author's Note D:

**Author's Note -**

I'm really _not_ feeling this story right now. When I started it, I was like "Hey! I can put this in Skinny Jean Faggots!" but it's kind of gone downhill since then.

That is NOT me saying I'm discontinuing or deleting this story.

I'm simply putting it on an indefinite hiatus. Technically, it might as well have already mean considering I haven't updated in a while - but this is just making it official.

I'm not giving up on this story - I'm just taking a break to focus on some other stuff.

I don't like feeling like every time I start a new story, that I'm letting the fans of this one down.

It will come back, though! (:

.

-**KillerMay**


	11. It's A Good Thing He's Sexy

**AN. **So, I was rereading chapter-whatever when Suigetsu and Karin go to Wal-Mart and I realized that I messed up because I initially had 2 different ideas for that was going to happen and they kind of mixed together... The first being that Suigetsu just says "Let's go to Walmart and try to get kicked out" - which he did, and the other being that Karin doesn't find out they're going to try and get kicked out until they're almost there - which also happened...

I CAN JUST BE SO BAD AT PROOF-READING SOMETIMES (that is, assuming I even proofread it before I posted it. In Somewhere In Brooklyn - I accidentally wrote "and _through_ the body in front of a _movie_ train" instead of  
and _throw_ the body in front of a _moving_ train"...) ):

I'LL FIX IT EVENTUALLY. MAYBE.

OH, AND QUESTION: Does anyone know when the knew season of Psych is supposed to come on?

* * *

So, I had this dog, right? And it's name was Peaches.

Now, Peaches had always been somewhat hyper compared to her brother, Pakkun. But, quite frankly, Pakkun never did much except walk around and occasionally sniff something, so Peaches still wasn't all that hyper.

Now, I had always kind of preferred Peaches over the other dogs (we had three, kaythanks) because she actually had some personally and whatnot.

But then, one day I came home from school (and they had finally confiscated my phone, those bastards) and saw all this ripped up cloth and everything so I followed the trail to find Peaches.

Sitting in a pile of ripped up skinny jeans.

It was not a good day for Peaches.

Skinny Jean Faggots.

**-Emotive Hardcore Just Doesn't Do It For Me Anymore.**

"Hey guys," Suigetsu said, addressing everybody to get their attention. And honestly, nothing good ever tended to come from Suigetsu addressing everybody. Sometimes, he would ask some creepy, perverted questions, other times, he would ask about getting a demon soul out of a *insert generic instrument with strings*.

"Oh God, what now," Karin muttered to Sakura, who was sitting next to her on the futon.

"Like, if you were going to have sex - which I'm sure you all will... Well, actually - not Sasuke. So... I guess not really Sakura either... and then you're Karin... - anyways, if you were _going_ to have sex, what song would you want to do it to?"

"...I'm sorry, what?" Sakura asked.

"If we ignore him, maybe he'll stop talking...," Sasuke suggested.

"No I won't," Suigetsu said. "I will always keep talking. What up. But, seriously - if you were going to do it with someone - what song would be awkwardly playing in the background?

"Mine would totally me 'Love Game' by Lady Gaga."

"Somehow, I knew you were going to say that..." Sakura said, shaking her head in shame.

"_I_," Karin began. "Would prefer something more like 'Hott' or 'My First Kiss' by 3Oh!3. Kaythanks."

"I would do it to 'The Great Escape' by Boys Like Girls because that's just hot," Sakura said, nodding.

Sasuke rolled his eyes and scrunched up his nose in distaste (because that's what Uchiha's do, after all). "You're all a bunch of perverts," he said, blankly.

"Oh _please_," Karin replied, waving him off and rolling her eyes. "Like you wouldn't do someone to 'Blow'."

Sakura laughed, "But then it would be awkward when he accidentally said 'Kesha' instead of the girl's name."

"But this is _Sasuke_," Suigetsu joined in. "It would either be _you_," he pointed at Sakura. "Or a hooker that wouldn't care what she's called as long as she got paid."

He then proceeded to high-five Karin.

_Chapter Ten;  
_**+It's A Good Thing He's Sexy.**

**-Cake.**

It was no secret that Sasuke Uchiha did not like cake (or any form of sweets, really). So, on his birthday, people weren't exactly sure _what_ to get him to replace said cake.

He was rather fond of tomatoes, but there were the rest of the guests to worry about, too - and WHO THE HELL WOULD WANT TO EAT TOMATOES ON THEIR BIRTHDAY?

Even Sasuke wasn't that insane.

Anyways, it was Suigetsu's job to come up with something to eat (and who's idea was that exactly? Suigetsu was likely to go get a cat and boil it).

So, on the day of Sasuke's "surprise party" (please, Karin had walked into his room and said, "What the fuck do you want for your birthday? Oh, by the way - we're throwing you a surprise party. I know how you hate surprises."), everybody (minus Suigetsu) - Sakura, Karin, Naruto, Neji (for some unfathomable reason considering they hated each other), Hinata, Juugo, and various other people he barely knew were all waiting for him to walk in so they could yell "Surprise!" in a stereotypical fashion that only really seems to happen on TV.

It wasn't all that fantastic however considering they were still missing the faux cake.

Eventually the door knob started to twist and everybody prepared themselves.

Then, Sasuke walked in the door.

"Surprise!" everyone yelled. Knowing it was coming, Sasuke didn't look surprised at all, but this didn't lead anyone to believe that someone had told him about the party. After all, he was Sasuke Uchiha. He only looked vaguely surprised when he was horribly surprised beyond all compare.

Seconds later, they heard somebody running up the sidewalk, panting. Suigetsu opened the door and tried to regain his breath.

"I... got... the... 'cake'," he gasped out.

He then held up a loaf of bread.

Needless to say, it was amazing and the best birthday party Sasuke had ever had. _Ever_.

**-Awkward?**

"Hey Sasuke," Sakura said, thoughtfully. She was leaning on his shoulder and staring at the ceiling. He was reading some boring book no one really cares about.

"Hn?" he grunted in response.

"Remember when you asked me my bra size?"

"...Yeah."

"Well, I've decided that I'll tell you _if_ you tell me your length. In _inches_, you damn Asian..."

**-Haha, You Didn't Really Think I Was Going To Elaborate On That, Did You?**

"This doesn't make any sense," Karin said, annoyed.

"It would make perfect sense if you would actually pay attention while I was _explaining it_," Suigetsu bit back, also annoyed. He had explained to her how to find the surface area of a cylinder _five times_ now.

"Well... explain it again!"

Suigetsu sighed a face-palmed before beginning to explain it _yet again_. "The formula for surface area of a cylinder is 2 pi r squared plus 2 pi r h. You substitute 3.14 for pi, the radius of the base for r and the height of the cylinder for h."

"But that's the confusing part! The cylinder is all sideways!"

If it was ever revealed how many times Suigetsu thought of suicide over the course of this study session, you would cry.

_Hard_.

Even if you hated Suigetsu with all of you being.

No, actually if you hated Suigetsu, you would cry harder because it'd be like, "Oh God, who knew he was going through such a hard time and all I did was sit here and hate on him!"

How _dare_ you.

**-Truce.**

"Dude... Katy Perry is... she's just amazing," Suigetsu said to Sasuke one day while they were at the mall.

"Agreed."

And that day was marked in history for it was the first time Suigetsu and Sasuke had ever agreed on someone on the Top 40 list being amazing.

(However, Sasuke would like to include that he'd still rather have a slumber party in Ke-dollar-sign-ha's basement.)

**-Return of the Emo Nerd Glasses.**

When Sasuke was woken up in the morning, he got pissed off. He liked sleep. Sleep was amazing and he rarely got enough.

(He hated being a light sleeper with a type of passion.)

So, he was definitely not amused (but when is he ever, really?) when Suigetsu, Sakura, and Karin all decided to show up at his house at seven in the morning on a Saturday.

I mean, really.

What the fuck.

Still, he dragged himself out of bed and stumbled, sleepily, down the stairs until he was at the front door. He pulled it open and tried to not collapse.

It probably didn't help that he didn't actually go to sleep until four AM...

"Oh look... they're back," Sakura observed.

"Yay - another day when I'm not alone!" Karin cried.

"Dude, seriously - something is attacking your face and you should get it checked out," Suigetsu said, frightened.

Sasuke slammed the door in their faces, pushed up his glasses, and went back upstairs.

**-Caterpillar?  
**_(Fun fact!: Inspired by real events!")_

"Oh my God, guys," Suigetsu said in a fearful tone. "I think... there's a caterpillar in my pocket."

"...What." Sasuke deadpanned.

"I think there's a caterpillar in my pocket!" he repeated.

"...Um... why?" Sakura asked, confused.

"I just reached into my pocket and I felt something fuzzy," he explained.

Karin rolled her eyes. "Why would there be a _caterpillar_ in your _pocket_?" she asked, blankly.

"...How does your hand even fit into your pocket?" Sakura asked. "My phone just barely goes into my skinny jeans..."

Suigetsu groaned, "I don't know _why_ it would be in there but there is something fuzzy in my pocket!"

"...Are you sure you don't have a hole in your pocket?" Karin asked.

"Yeah, that would explain it," Sakura added, laughing. Sasuke rolled his eyes, but his face still held an amused expression.

"...No, guys - I think there's a caterpillar in my pocket."

"Or you could think it's a caterpillar because it's awkwardly small, but you really just have a hole in your pocket and haven't... um... shaved," Sakura replied, awkwardly.

"...There is something fuzzy in my pocket!"

"Why don't you just take whatever it is out?" Sasuke asked, blankly.

"...But what if it's a caterpillar?" They all stared at him like he was stupid. "Okay, okay... I'm going to do it." He started to reach for his pocket. After about three minutes, he did actually reach into his pocket and pull something out. "Oh, it's a string from when we were sewing in FACS."

"...Idiot."

**-Chick Flicks.**

"Sasuke...I love you."

This heartfelt confession was brought on by the movie they were currently watching. Apparently, romantic movies make you want to bare your soul to whoever the hell is in the room.

"...Shut _up_, Suigetsu."

**-NSync On The Backstreet Block.**

"Karin, whatever happened to boy bands?" Sakura asked as they sat watching a documentary on the Backstreet Boys.

She shrugged, "They... they grew up."

"B-but... _why_?"

"...Because they want it that way."

"...Tell me why."

"I don't know, but it sure is a shame..."

"Could Big Time Rush be considered a boy band?"

"If they didn't have a shitty show on Nickelodeon."

"I resent that."

"I'm sure you do."

**-Til The World Ends.**

"Okay, guys - I have to do this writing prompt thing and I have no idea, so I'm asking you," Sakura announced. "If you were the last person on Earth, what would you do?"

"Kill myself," Sasuke replied, quickly.

"I would go on a joy ride - assuming there are still cars and shit," Karin answered.

"I would jerk off. Like, twenty four-seven," Suigetsu replied.

"That's another option...," Sasuke said, thoughtfully. "I guess I would do that and _then_ kill myself."

"I would do it in _public_," Suigetsu continued. "Though I guess there wouldn't really _be_ a public, but like - I really hated that lady who owned the pet store, so I would go to the pet store and be like 'What now, bitch?'."

Sasuke nodded, confirming the amazingness of that idea.

Sakura and Karin gagged.

"Okay, I'm just going to go with Karin's idea. Kay? Thanks for nothing, pervs."

"...We're teenage guys, Sakura," Suigetsu said in an all-knowing manner. "It's what we _do_."

"Please stop talking."

**-Keke Palmer's Wearing My Jeans.**

"Suigetsu, I need you to act gay for a second and tell me how I look in these jeans," Karin said.

"Why _me_?" he asked.

"Because it's _fucking weird_ when Sasuke acts like a homosexual man."

"...Well, when you put it like that..."

"Anyways, so yeah - the jeans?" Karin was wearing a simple pair of black and white checkered skinny jeans. They were the kind that stretch out to fit you perfectly, though.

"_Ooh girl_," Suigetsu said in the voice of an overly flamboyant gay guy. "Those jeans are just absolutely _fabulous_. Mmhm." He then proceeded to snap his fingers in a Z-formation.

"Good boy," Karin replied, patting his head.

**-Why Not?**

"What's up with him?" Karin asked Suigetsu as she walked into Sasuke's house. Sasuke was looking all broody, sitting on the couch.

Suigetsu replied, "His useless, his life sucks, and he's your problem now." The white-haired boy then made his escape.

Shit.

"Uh... Sasuke?" Karin asked, confused. "Um... what's wrong?"

"Everybody hates me," he replied, quietly.

"That's not true," she said in that I'm-trying-to-cheer-you-up-I-don't-really-mean-half-of-anything-I-say way. "You have a lot of winning qualities that people love."

"...You're just saying that."

"No, really!" she said. Dear God, did Suigetsu do something to make him like this? "You're... smart and... um..."

"...Are you hitting on me?" he asked.

"What? No."

"...Riiight," he replied. "It's okay, I won't tell anyone."

"I wasn't hitting on you!"

"Exactly," he replied with a wink.

**=What A Fantastic Way To Start The Show.**

By this time, Sasuke was sitting upside down on the couch, reading a magazine, and quietly humming "Blow" (_This place about to blow-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh) _to himself. Sakura was laying on the same couch, her head on his chest. She was staring at the ceiling, doing nothing.

Karin and Suigetsu were both sitting on the floor, having a competition to see who could hold their breath the longest. So far, Suigetsu was winning.

Eventually, it was Suigetsu who broke the silence, after Karin couldn't hold her breath any longer. "You know what?" he asked, rhetorically. "I'm thinking Edge of Glory would be more amazing to have sex to."

"...Shut _up_, Suigetsu," Sasuke replied.

_Chapter Ten;  
_**It's A Good Thing He's Sexy.**

_(end)_

**AN.** I'M ON THE EDGE... OF GLORY. AND I'M HANGING ON A MOMENT OF TRUTH. Is it just be or did this chapter seem a lot more perverted than usual? *shruggs*  
And the caterpillar thing happened to a friend. He reached into his pocket, felt something fuzzy, and assumed it was a caterpillar... So, we all joked about him having a hole in his pocket. (:


	12. Dance, Dance

**AN. **One day, I'm going to look back on this story and think "What... the fuck."

This story is almost over. *tears* (but it couldn't last forever!)

With what I'm planning, this is going to be the last normal chapter, but I might change my mind if I don't like it.  
If I continue with what I have planned, there will be five more chapters (four of which will be short and the last of which will be the epilogue). The four chapters would be "special" and I'm not sure if I'll be able to think through all of that... xD  
If I change my mind, there will be another 2 chapters, one of which will be the epilogue.

Anyways, I had to listen to the New Boyz talk about skinny jeans to get the first part of this. And copy down what they said.  
(The New Boyz sure are useful for things when it comes to skinny jeans. Trufax.)

* * *

"Skinny jeans was out in the _eighties_, that's the thing."

"Yeah, you know you see it like, back in the day, and yo they dad's was probably wearing it - all the haters and stuff. Like, in New York it was actually big and everywhere on the east coast it was big. So, I mean that's how it is, we feel comfortable doing it 'cause that's just the look."

-New Boyz

Skinny Jean Faggots.

**-Live Life Like A SunDrop Commercial.**

"Dear God, do you _ever_ shut up?" Karin yelled at Suigetsu, while also throwing a pot at him.

(_A_ pot, children. Not pot - _a_ pot. Because throwing pot at people is illegal. Throwing a pot at someone could also fall under assault, but still. Don't throw pot.)

"Did you just throw a motherfucking _pot_ at me? What the hell?"

"Yes, I did. Because you don't know when the hell to shut the fuck up!"

Okay, here's the situation: Suigetsu and Karin are in the kitchen. They're at Karin's house and they were getting drinks for everybody. (Sasuke and Sakura being in the living room.) Then, Suigetsu made some generic vulgar comment - as per usual - so Karin replied, calling him an idiot. Said idiot continued to make various vulgar comments that couldn't be allowed on television and probably not the internet either which is why they aren't being displayed, eventually leading to Karin getting very, very angry - which was also normal - and since they were in the kitchen and a pot was left sitting out, she threw it at him.

"And that gives you the right to try and give me _brain damage_?"

"Oh please, moron - it hit your chest, I wasn't aiming at your head."

Suigetsu pulled her close to him and whispered, in the most evil tone he could muster - which was surprisingly evil for someone like Suigetsu, "That doesn't mean you can," then he started yelling again, "Throw a Goddamn pot at my head!"

They stood there, glaring at each other, _really_ close.

And... I'm sure you can figure out what happens next, but I'll go ahead and tell you anyways.

It was _Karin_ who grabbed his shirt and pulled him down (because let's face it, Suigetsu is awkwardly tall) for a kiss.

And that is the story of "The Great Make-Out Session of March"

_Chapter Eleven;  
_**+Dance, Dance.**

**-War.**

"And that is why you're all idiots," Tsunade finished, glaring at the four teens sitting in front of her. She already hated being principal, it was kids like these that made it worse.

Sakura had her arms and legs crossed and was trying to hold back the smirk _that really wanted to be on her face right now_.

Karin was taking on the same position, but was very blatantly smirking.

Suigetsu was slouched awkwardly in his chair with his arms crossed, glaring at nothing in particular.

Sasuke looked like he had just taken a pimp-slap to the face.

"I'm not an idiot," he said, blankly.

"Really?" Tsunade replied. "Were you not listening to the multiple reasons I just listed?"

"_I'm not an idiot_."

"I'm sorry Mr. Uchiha, did you want detention?"

"No, because that was ruin my perfect record. Which I have because _I am not an idiot_."

Now Sakura was smirking, and Suigetsu was sitting up straighter in his seat to watch. Sasuke had his arms crossed and was glaring directly at the principal, who was glaring right on back.

"The rest of you may go," she said, not breaking eye contact.

They sat there until the end of the school day (which was only about half an hour since they were excused from the last period of the day), glaring at each other, until it was eventually Tsunade who broke eye contact.

**-No, seriously.**

"Suigetsu, if you go buy me some ribbon, I'll pay for your soda next time we go get something to eat," Karin said. She was laying on the floor with a large poster board for her project in front of her.

"...Really?"

"Yes."

"Swear?"

"Swear."

"...Okay."

So, Suigetsu left to go to Target because it used shades of red, unlike Walmart - which is blue and white, and the lighting in there is better so it doesn't make you horribly depressed.

Getting there and getting the ribbon was easy. It was on the way _back_ that he had trouble. He was walking out to his car (which was sexy, in case you were wondering), with the bag in his hand when some old lady _runs_ past him, grabbing the bag in the process.

He ran after her yelling, "Give me back my ribbon! That lady stole my ribbon!", which got him several much-deserved stares.

Did anyone help him though? No.

One problem with Suigetsu is that, while he can swim really fast and is freakishly tall with long legs, he _sucks_ at running.

By the time he got to the end of the Target parking lot (which is quite big, actually), he was already out of breath. Not the old lady though. She was still running. Running far away with Karin's ribbon.

True story.

**-Screw Jason, Derek Is Amazing All By Himself.**

"Why can't murder be legal?" Sakura said quietly to Sasuke as Karin and Suigetsu argued on the opposite side of the lunch table.

"It is if you do it right," he replied.

"And how exactly would one do it _right_?" she asked, raising an eyebrow.

Sasuke shrugged, "Ask Itachi, I'm sure he's murdered countless people."

"Do you think he'd murder two more?" she asked, tilting her head towards Suigetsu and Karin who were now turned away from each other with their arms crossed and eyes closed.

"Maybe. But rule number one of doing it right is that no one else can know. And we would know..."

"Damn."

"Hn."

**-The Scarf Of Sexual Preference.**

"Hey _Sasukkeeee_," Karin drawled out in that 'i'm about to ask something uncomfortable' kind of way. Sasuke sighed and looked up from the magazine in his hand and over to her, raising a perfectly-shaped eyebrow (seriously, look at Sasuke's eyebrows once in a while, they're _amazing_). "Are you gay?" she asked, innocently.

Sasuke dropped the magazine and stared at her. "Why... the fuck does everyone ask me that?"

Karin gave a half-assed laugh and crossed her arms. "Are you seriously asking that?"

Sasuke gave her that blank stare where his eyes held no emotion and his mouth was slightly parted as if to say, "Your ignorance makes Asians everywhere cry".

He used that look too much.

Karin groaned and rolled her eyes. "Sasuke, if you look up '_metrosexual_' in the dictionary, there's a picture of you next to it."

"Dictionaries don't have pictures."

"...Maybe it's a picture dictionary!"

"If it's a dictionary and it has pictures, it's probably intended for children—why would they put '_metrosexual_' in a dictionary for four-year olds?"

"...So they know it's okay to want to look fabulous?"

Sasuke face-palmed. "You're an idiot."

"...Weren't we talking about something?"

"What the hell."

**-Even Jerry Springer Has Baggage.**

So, Suigetsu was currently pulling an IPod commercial (even though he totally owned a Zune).

He had his head phones plugged in and was making rapid and awkward motions in which he was basically holding his Zune clutched in one fist and his other hand in a fist. He was this proceeding to swing his upper body back and forth, left and right, and flipping his hair a ridiculous amount.

Of course, it wouldn't be typical-thing-you-see-in-most-teenage-movies if he wasn't also _singing_.

So, there he was.

"Dancing" in the middle of Sakura's living room, while screaming, "HAPPY IN THE CLUB WITH A BOTTLE OF RED WINE, STARS IN OUR EYES 'CAUSE WE'RE HAVIN' A GOOD TIME, EH-EH, EH-EH, SO HAPPY I COULD DIE!"

And this is exactly how Sakura found him when she returned home to find out someone had broken into her house.

**-I'm Running Out Of Ideas.**

Suigetsu's car was fucking awesome.

(Okay, so it was Mangetsu's old car that he crashed seventeen times, but he hadn't _died_, so it must be a pretty good car, right?)

He was the oldest out of the four and therefore the first to get his license (because he was, in fact, a relatively decent driver) and therefore the first to get a _car_. (Followed by Sakura the next month, Karin in June, and lastly Sasuke a month after Karin.)

Anyways, so Suigetsu's car was _fucking awesome_.

But, because Suigetsu's car was so fucking awesome, he was quite protective of his fucking awesome car that was fucking awesome.

So, no food. No drinks. No dead bodies (while he was explaining the rules, he made sure to cough and look at Sasuke).

"That's fucking ridiculous," Sasuke said, staring blankly at Suigetsu as he explained the rules of the shark mobile.

"I agree," Sakura said. "What if your mom was in a car accident and she broke both of her legs and she needed you to go get groceries?"

"Then I'll take her car."

"...What if you were driving down the highway and there was somebody who hadn't eaten in so long that they couldn't even move but there was a grocery store a few miles away so all you had to do was go and get them something and bring it back so they could live?" Sakura asked.

"If there's a grocery store right there, they must be near some kind of town. Someone else will find them."

Sasuke stared at him, blankly. "You sick _fuck_."

**-aaaaaaaaaaa glee!**

"Samuel is amazing and if he doesn't win, I will be so disappointed that I'll scream and kill someone," Sakura said to Karin.

Karin scoffed and replied, "_Please_, Damian is so much better, it's not even. And you know what else Damian is? _Irish_."

"So? Samuel has _dreads_."

"Damian has blue eyes!"

"Really? Eye color? That's your argument?"

"Shut up—"

"What the _hell_ are you two talking about?" Suigetsu asked. He had been sitting there next to Sasuke watching them argue and was horribly confused.

"The Glee Project, duh," they replied in unison before continuing to argue.

Suigetsu twitched, before turned to Sasuke, "Dude, let's get out of..., his voice trailed off as Sasuke joined the conversation.

"Obviously, _Marissa_ should win."

"...Fuck all of you."

**-Why Don't You Come On Over, Vaaaaalerie?**

"Dude," Suigetsu said in that way that sounded so stoned it wasn't even funny. "This pen... is amazing."

...Maybe he _was_ stoned.

Sasuke looked up and glared at him. "Shut up, Idiot."

"No, seriously. Like, it's so _smooth_ and shit. This... I'm in love with this pen."

"Suigetsu," Sakura said. "That is _my_ colorful purple pen. So fuck you."

"Hey Sakura," Karin said in that I'm-about-to-crush-your-dreams kind of way.

"What?"

"Guess what?"

"_What_?"

"I have colorful _notebook_ paper now."

Sakura sputtered out some kind of nonsense and then, "DAMMIT."

Because Karin won.

(but at least she still had her lime green sharpie.)

**=Totes.**

"Hey Sasuke," Sakura said in a questioning voice, pulling herself away from his shoulder (which was really warm, by the way—he had _awesome_ shirts).

"Hn?"

"Why have Suigetsu and Karin been in the kitchen so long?"

He shrugged in response and yawned. He was about to go to _sleep_. He was _comfortable_, dammit.

She scoffed. "It's my _birthday_, they're supposed to be in here celebrating it with _me_. Imma go check on them."

"Mmkay."

She stood up and walked over to the door that separated the kitchen and the living room. She opened it, stared for a couple seconds, closed it, and went back over to sit next to Sasuke, once again leaning her head on his shoulder.

He raised an eyebrow (which she couldn't see, but she could _feel_ it. Seriously).

"They're making out."

"Aa."

_Chapter Eleven;  
_**Dance, Dance.**

_(end)_

**AN. **...Well it did said SuiKa, didn't it?

So, um, can I just say—I love how out of fashion this is going to get. I mean, one day somebody might read this and be like, "What the fuck is The Glee Project?" (actually, some of you might already be thinking that—it's a reality show on Oxygen to find a new member of New Directions from the TV show "Glee"), or The Glee Project will still be on and this will be referring to _season one_ (which Samuel _better_ win, dammit).

OH, AND HEY: Is it just me, or did Sasuke get more in character as this fic progressed? I feel like I've gotten better at writing him (at least in a world where his parents aren't dead, but whatever).


	13. Sasuke's Yearbook

**AN.** Mmkay... here we go.

* * *

**This Yearbook Belongs To**: Sasuke Uchiha

* * *

_HOLY FUCK._

_(I know we're not supposed to write "profanity" in yearbooks, but since when have I ever cared?)_

_Anyways, we've known each other for SO long and I've never stopped totally loving you (in a plat...non-weird way. Damn pen)._

_Like, seriously, can you believe we're actually graduating? It's fucking awesome._

_And stop looking at me like that. I closed it 'cause a teacher came by. Seriously. Damn._

_Anyways, I'm sure you're off to law school or whatever. You know. 'Cause you're the Asian stereotype. Seriously. Damn. (:_

_Now, what was I saying?_

_Oh yeah, we've had a ton of awesome memories together. ('Cause you know, "you're Sasuke.")_

_You were the 'sexy' in 'to think he did it all while still being sexy'._

_You're my "father"._

_Remember Sauce-y,_

_Karin brought you into this world,_

_And Karin can take you out. (:_

_So enjoy your Gatorade while you can, G._

_-Karin_

.

.

.

**Sakura let me borrow the sexy pen. What up. This thing is still my lover. You know, whatever.**

**So, like seriously, Asian Persuasion—I love ya, no hetero, and I just spelled persuasion right. I think.**

**You should wear your emo nerd glasses for graduation tomorrow so everyone can be like "what the fuck is attacking his face".**

**(I only cuss in honor of you, lovely ;])**

**And yeah. I did just draw a winky-face like you'd see if I was typing it.**

**Got a problem, biznitch?**

**Anyways, um yeah. I predict that you and Sakura will get married and have three BABEHZ.**

**I guess we'll find out at the reunion, won't we?**

**(Just kidding, you can't leave me out of your life for ten years. HEART.)**

**Seriously.**

**Don't leave me out of your life for ten years.**

**I'll only have KARIN.**

**(:**

**I'll make sure to cry on your shoulder at graduation.**

**OH, AND DUDE, SERIOUSLY, IT'S POSSESSED. THANKS.**

**-Suigetsu HOZUKI, don't forget ittttt!**

.

.

.

**_Aww, I'm writing in your yearbook! How cute, ;)_**

**_So, I'm sure everyone else who's dating is either having "that" talk or writing longs notes about how IN LURVE they are, but I'm not going to do that. Because I have pink hair._**

**_And a blue pen._**

**_What up?_**

**_So, yeah, I'm watching you write in my yearbook and you write really fast. I better be able to read that, darling._**

**_Oh, so random: I love you hair. Seriously. I don't think I would've ever started talking to you if it wasn't for your hair._**

**_(I bet you didn't know that, did you?)_**

**_Oh, and you had those awesome colored pencils, but whatever._**

**_So, um, I'll never forget that day when Naruto and I broke into your house and ate pizza (and I'm sure you won't either now that it's forever written in your yearbook with a sexy colorful pen). Or that time you and your brother had that conversation without real words. Or all of your complaining when we had to sit in alphabetical order by last name._**

**_(Haha. Uchiha.)_**

**_Like... Seriously._**

**_And if anything was to... happen, I still don't think I would ever forget any of that._**

**_'Cause you're my best friend, and I love you._**

**_No homo._**

**_-Sakura_**

.

.

.

**AN.** So, yeah, Karin's yearbook is next. These will all be fairly short but I'm uploading them fast. (:


	14. Karin's Yearbook

**AN.** Yes.

* * *

**This Yearbook Belongs To**:  Karin Kusa

* * *

I hate you.

Just kidding.

(kind of)

You are my daughter after all.

I don't have much I can actually say to you.

Seriously.

So... I'm just going to take up some space with random bullshit.

(Who the fuck listens when teachers say to not write cuss words? That's like... taking away half of my damn vocabulary. Us Asians only know so much of your Engrish.)

In case you completely forget me after high school, I am, in fact, Asian.

...And I'm Sasuke.

Because you seem to like to bring that up.

Oh, and Itachi told me that he hated you.

-Sasuke

.

.

.

**_Screw you and you colorful notebook paper._**

**_I'm Sasuke's best friend._**

**_-Sakura_**

**_._**

**_._**

**_Hehe, just kidding, I love you. Seriously. Like, without you—my high school life would suck. Because I would be hanging around guys all the time._**

**_AND WHAT IF I BECAME FRIENDS WITH INO-PIG AGAIN?_**

**_*shivers*_**

**_Anyways, dollface, if you forget about me, I'll forget about you. So treat me like a My Little Pony._**

**_(you know "my little pony, my little pony, you'll always be in my heart")_**

**_-Sakura_**

.

.

.

**You like Kesha.**

**I don't know if I should write in this or not.**

**(but then I wrote in SASUKE'S and he's the worst, so whatever)**

**Um... I can't think of anything to say.**

**Like, at all.**

**Shit.**

**Um... I love you?**

**Yeah. Sure. Let's go with that.**

**You have my number. HIT ME UP.**

**-Suigetsu**

* * *

**AN.** Karin's not as loved as Sasuke. So the messages weren't as long.

Poor thing.

(Actually, I think the saddest part is that Sasuke's is probably the longest.)


	15. Suigetsu's Yearbook

**AN. **Suigetsuuuu.

* * *

**This Yearbook Belongs To**: Suigetsu Hozuki

* * *

**_This is weird..._**

**_You're one of my best friends and I talk to you the least._**

**_So... um._**

**_SUIGETSUUUU._**

**_You have a confusing name, bro. True story._**

**_You kind of scare me, too. At least Sasuke has other issues beside Kesha (...kind of), but with you it's like, it's always either about Lady Gaga or Satan... Or you're just being stupid._**

**_So... uh... HAGS?_**

**_Hehe..._**

**_-Sakura_**

.

.

.

Lady Gaga sucks and I'm 99 percent sure that I hate you.

Just kidding, I could never hate you, Sexygetsu. You have my heart.

Just kidding. Fuck you.

You got me bread for my birthday, you're constantly dissing Kesha, the greatest musical artist of this generation, and if I hear one more thing about how my guitar is possessed, I might snap and kill you.

AND I'M NOT CHINESE, YOU BASTARD.

When you and Karin realize you're in love and decide to get married, I'm not coming to your wedding.

(And for the love of God, don't have kids. You'd make a horrible father. Making your kids listen to Gaga.)

-Sasuke

.

.

.

_You son of a bitch._

_I like what Sasuke wrote and the only reason Sakura couldn't think of anything to saw is because she's a nice person._

_I hate you, you're a complete dickhead._

_You keep stealing my flash drives, too. And then returning them to me once you've downloaded a ton of lesbian porn to it with names like "School Drug Vid 1" so I'll open it, thinking it be some good memory or our amazingness and then my computer gets a virus._

_And you owe me a seven dollars and forty cents for all the paper you've borrowed from me._

_Dick._

_I hope you die._

_...One day, you'll look back at this and think we're serious, (:_

_(except you do owe me that money.)_

_LOVE YOU, KINDA,_

_-Karin_

.

.

.

**AN.** Last is Sakura and then all that's left is the epilogue.


	16. Sakura's Yearbook

**AN.** Okay, here's Sakura.

* * *

**This Yearbook Belongs To:** Sakura Haruno

* * *

**...Shit.**

**I'm not prepared for this.**

**Your yearbook is going to be hard.**

**Seriously.**

**Um... I remember that one time we had that awkward conversation about Karin.**

**I've never thought you were a lesbian.**

**And I'm sure your hair is very real.**

**Yes.**

**-Suigetsu**

.

.

.

_Sakuraaaa!_

_Holy shiz, we're about to graduate tomorrow! ):_

_If I don't hear from you within a week, I'll assume you forgot about me and replace you. (You know how I am about calling someone first, so seriously.)_

_Um, you're like my best friend ever and if I didn't know you, my life would suck._

_Remember that time we were riding around and thought we were in Kentucky but it was just a Kentucky Fried Chicken? (and they have some damn good fried chicken, by the way. Seriously.)_

_I'll miss all the times you would come to my house at three in the morning and we would talk about some random hot guy you saw!_

_Or the sexiness of Itachi!_

_(Oh wait... Sasuke still hasn't signed your yearbook, has he? I wonder if he'll notice that...)_

_Anyways, I'll totally be crying all up on you tomorrow and it'll totally ruin my make-up because I forgot to save money to buy some more water proof mascara and eyeliner, so don't blame me if your pretty dress has black stains on it. Blame my mother for not caring enough to buy it for me._

_-Karin_

.

.

.

...You and Karin get together and talk about the "sexiness" of my brother. I'm disturbed.

What the fuck.

So, I've decided I'm going to write a ton of shit here to make you feel bad if you don't. I'm sure you'll be confused because I'm apparently so "emo" that I'm incapable of writing in a yearbook but that's not true because it's a goddamn yearbook and I'm perfectly capable of saying a lot when I don't actually have to talk.

Just so you know—I did buy that NSYNC album for you by myself and yes the guy did look at me weird.

Whatever, I kind of love you.

Did you know that?

Even if I'm sure you prefer Justin Timberlake.

I don't see the appeal, but I guess I'm not suppose to, so whatever.

I really don't get your sudden obsession with them...

Don't cry on me tomorrow.

-Sasuke

* * *

**AN. **Sasuke is out of character. But he's signing a _yearbook_, who stays in character while they're signing a yearbook?

Anyways, next chapter is the epilogue and then it's done.


	17. And The Sexiest One You Ever Did See

**AN.** Okay, first things first: I want to thank EVERYONE who's read this story and even more so the people who've reviewed because every time I open my email and see that I have a new review, I first brace myself in case it's a flame and then get super happy when it's someone who loves the story. It makes me soso happy. (:

Um, a lot of people have asked where I get my ideas so I'd first like to say that I do not now nor have I ever taken drugs. It's mostly just if anything comes to be at any given point in the day, I'll write it down.

Anyways, I _loved_ writing this story and I know that one day I'm going to look back on it and think about how I stupid I was back when I wrote this, but still, it was worth it.

And I want to **dedicate** this chapter to everyone who's ever reviewed and Justin Timberlake because he's horribly amazing.

* * *

Oh please, we were amazing before being amazing was _cool_.

Skinny Jean Faggots

**-I've Got The Magic.**

Sasuke hated speeches and presentations with a type of passion and if there was _any_ time he had made something lower than a 100, it was a presentation. (Thank God for bonus points.)

Nevertheless, there he was giving a fucking _speech_. He had tried to decline but he was valedictorian (_obviously_), so he was kind of forced to.

He ended the speech in his overly fake I-so-want-to-be-here voice with the typical "and here's the graduation class" blah blah blah and then everyone stood up and people cheered and whoopty-fucking-doo.

He was officially a high school graduate.

*smirk*

_Epilogue;_  
**+And The Sexiest One You Ever Did See**

**-Whoomp! There It Is.**

"So, I've decided I'm in love with Justin Timberlake," Sakura announced. "Again."

"...Again?" questioned Suigetsu, not really all that interested, but whatever.

"Yes. Again. And I want someone to get my an NSYNC CD for my birthday. Preferably either _No Strings Attached_ or _Celebrity_. Because 'Bye Bye Bye' and 'Pop' are totally my favorite songs of the moment."

Karin sighed. "This isn't going to turn into something similar to Sasuke and Suigetsu's obsessions with Kesha and Lady Gaga, right?"

"...I don't... I don't think that's _possible_."

**-The Most Important Part Of The Entire Story.**

He's staring at me again and I think he knows.

Him and his stupid white hair, I wonder how he'd feel if I stared at him.

I need eyes...

Those other kids are fighting and he doesn't even look over at them. What the hell? LOOK AWAY.

LOOK AWAY, DAMMIT. I COMMAND YOU.

"SATAN!" he yells.

Ah, I got so mad that a string broke.

Damn.

Tis the life of a guitar.

**-I Love How PC It Is.**

"Dude, Sasuke, you know how you're like... Chinese?" Suigetsu asked. All the blood was rushing to his head because he was sitting upside down on the couch and he was most definitely _not_ thinking straight.

"...Excuse me?"

"You're like, Chinese and shit and—"

"I am not fucking Chinese, you son of a bitch."

"—You cuss _way_ too much, bro."

"You just called me Chinese, I will cuss as much as I fucking want."

"I think I might pass out."

"Do I _seem_ Chinese to you? Have you ever even _met_ a Chinese person?"

"Too much blood... rushing to my head..."

"No, you haven't, you son of a bitch. Maybe _I_ can look at someone and guess what kind of Asian they are, but I've clearly stated thousands of fucking times that I am _Japanese_, bitch."

And then Suigetsu passed out.

And Sasuke continued ranting.

**-He Watched All Of It.**

"Hey Karin, thanks for letting me borrow your flash drive," Suigetsu said, handing her the small black object.

"Um... you're welcome?" she replied as he walked off. She didn't remember letting him borrow it in the first place... But whatever, she had been looking for it. She had made a powerpoint for a school presentation thing and needed to save it.

So, she plugged it into her computer and saved it.

Like a boss.

Then she noticed a ton of stuff on her flash drive that she didn't realize was on there. Like, a ton of school videos her, Suigetsu, and Sasuke had made.

So, she opened one.

And she was going to _kill_ Suigetsu.

So, she closed _out_ of the porn only to have website pop up, so she closed that only to have _another_ website pop up, this time it was "ten way to please your partner with video". So she closed out of _that_, only to have yet _another_ website pop-up, so she closed out of _that_ only to have her computer crash.

She grabbed her laptop, ripped the flash drive out of the other computer and plugged it in. Opening it to look at the file... "0 Files Found".

...She was going to _kill_ him.

**-Road Trip.**

"Did that sign just say we're in Kentucky?"

"_Shit_. ...Wait, we've only been driving for like, twenty minutes."

"Oh, I can see it clearer now, it says Kentucky _Fried Chicken_." She paused. "...The mall is only like, ten minutes away."

"..._Shit_."

**-Sunshineee, There Ain't A Thing That You Can Do That's Gonna Ruin My Nightttt.**

Whenever Sakura got seriously pissed (which wasn't very often, actually, she got _irritated_, but never full out _ragey_), she would play music _really loudly_. Like, if you were going to visit her or something, you would know _not to_ before you even got up to her door.

She had gotten the police called on her several times for "disturbing the peace".

Anyways, this was something Karin didn't know.

They had just met and were just going to hang out, so she went over and the music was playing freakishly loud.

She rang the doorbell anyways, though.

After that day, it was found that Karin was among the few (two, along with Sasuke) people who could bring Sakura out of her "I'm going to kill everyone" mood.

**-Mother Knows Best.**

After Sasuke and Sakura started dating, her father decided that she hated him.

You know, in that typical "touch my daughter and I'll castrate you" kind of way. Hehheh. Yeah.

So, of course, Sasuke wasn't aware that making the transition from best friends to boyfriend/girlfriend would get him some haters (especially since it was his _mother_ who wanted them to go out so badly... but whatever).

So, Sakura invited him over to her house, as was usual. And he went over, as was usual. And they hung out, as was usual. (and sure, his tongue _might_ have ended up in her mouth at some point, but that was totally besides the point.)

And her mother invited him to stay for dinner, as she usually did, and he gave her that "I'm a good person, I wouldn't want to be a bother" bullshit, _as usual_ and she insisted _as usual_, and he agreed, _as usual_.

And then they actually _had_ dinner...

Have you ever been glared at throughout an entire meal?

Yeah.

And it's already awkward enough eating while someone is looking at you...

After dinner, Sasuke and Sakura went up to her room to do homework (and sure, his tongue _might_ have ended up in her mouth at some point, but math turned him on).

So, anyways, yeah—they were sitting there, doing math (and Sasuke was probably whispering dirty words to it in his head, _you're a filthy slut, Pythagorean Theorem. _Or... something like that), when Sakura's father busted into the room.

They looked up and stared at him for a moment and he stared back, wide-eyed. "Oh... I thought you might have been inappropriately touching my daughter."

"Uh... No..." Sasuke replied, slightly unsure.

"Oh, so you think you're too _good_ to touch my daughter?"

Sakura's eyes widened. "Dad!"

Sasuke looked scared. "Wh-What?" He just stuttered. What the _fuck_. "No."

Mr. Haruno's eyes narrowed. "I'll be watching you, Boy."

Then—and Sasuke _swears_ this happened—he _faded_. Like, he was standing there and then he just faded away. What the fuck.

**-Beach.**

Suigetsu was one with water.

Sasuke, on the other hand, _hated_ water. He was like a _cat_.

That, of course, didn't stop them from going on a road trip to the beach.

Suna. A _freakishly_ hot place where it was always windy, but they still had the _best _beaches. It didn't even matter that it was hot because you were probably going to be in the water.

Sakura and Karin were all for it because they were _ladiesss_ and wanted to be tan and they actually enjoyed the beach.

Sasuke had been sticking his head in a freezer trying to get sick before the weekend.

It didn't work...

So, there they were. At the beach. Sakura, Karin, and Suigetsu all in the water and jerking around.

And Sasuke. Sitting on the beach. Under an umbrella. Dying of heat stroke. And desperately trying not to get a tan because it make him look fucked up.

True story.

**-The Feeling Of Rust Against My Salad Fingers.**

Suigetsu had this theory.

This theory that the entire world could be conquered... with _spoons_.

See, all you'd have to do is buy (or steal) every single spoon in the world. See, there are a lot of things you can't make without spoons. So, once you had every spoon, you could force people to obey you for _spoons_.

He was also convinced that spoons made really good shields and shit so they could learn how to fight with _spoons_ and they could take out the police force and anyone trying to go against them.

You know.

With _spoons_.

**-Scratch That, Mothers Definitely Don't Know Best.**

It seems like, if you have guy friends (and you're a girl), you mother will automatically think they like you.

Thus was the case with Sakura and Karin.

"You know, Sakura, I think that Suigetsu kid likes you."

"You know, Karin, I think that Sasuke kid likes you."

They didn't even really think that maybe Sasuke likes Sakura or Suigetsu likes Karin because they had simply known each other for _way too long_.

It's almost amazing how wrong they were...

**=Goodbye And Goodnight.**

True to her word, Karin did, in fact, cry all over Sakura and get black stains all over her pretty dress. Suigetsu fake-cried on Sasuke and Sakura cried on everyone.

But why wouldn't they? They were graduation and they didn't really know where they were going from there. And Sasuke was _still_ short.

Like, seriously. He didn't hit a growth spurt or _anything_. What the fuck.

Eventually, Sakura latched herself onto Sasuke, crying all over his shoulder, and he held her and stared blankly in a Sasuke-ish fashion.

They had _graduated_ and what if they didn't see each other again and walk to that ice cream place and force Sasuke to pay even though he wasn't going to get any because he didn't like sweets?

What if they didn't get to take random road trips and get lost?

What if they didn't get to annoy Sasuke's brother anymore?

Or stalk their friends on dates?

Or listen to Sasuke bitch? (Okay, well... that might of been a plus, but whatever.)

Or borrow each others skinny jeans?

Or argue about pop artists?

Or watch reality TV?

Then again, that probably wouldn't ever happen. Hell, they would need to bro-fist it to make it official.

.

.

"Sasuke?"

"Hn?"

"I still can't believe you wore skinny jeans to your high school graduation."

(:

**AN.** I was trying to think of something else to add and I couldn't... I'm completely brain dead right now... It's over though. D: And I love each and every person who reviewed or favorited or alerted this story 'cause all the positive feedback has made me really happy and just... thanks. (:

Over and out—


End file.
